A real man. All them ladies are jealous of any woman dating a Mike. His hair parts like a beautiful waterfall. His eyes look like the ocean. His lips are warm and he kisses reaaalll good. He is the perfect boyfriend and any girl dating him will have very few female friends, because they're all jealous whores. Mike is fearless and will buy tampons for his woman. He is also very inappropriate in public places. I loooooove me some Mike.
What is that God-like figure hovering over my bed? Ohh, it's just Mike.