12 definitions by Stagmen
When a skinny, snobby, entitled chick wears butt & form-fitting pants, but her butt, waist and lower back are all the same width, giving not the appearance of an hourglass figure and a shapely rump, but rather the appearance of a square box from the middle of her back to the top of her hamstrings.
Dude, how's that date go the other night? Well, she wore Spongebob Baylypants and her ass looked like ole square pants himself, and when she took them off at the end of the night, it was not much better, but I did make that square box butt jiggle from her back to the top of her legs when I did the deed!
by Stagmen June 22, 2017
Colorado is known for its ascending ski lifts, but the Colorado Cropduster is a special treat that can be given on any crowded public escalator: all you need is a healthy fart and a crowded escalator. The gift-giver gets on the escalator and while walking up it, lets out a steamy fart for the unassuming people behind him. The fart and the smell ascends with the gift giver and all of those behind him have to walk up and through the smell as it slowly hovers and ascends to the top. Even those who are not walking up the escalator and are just stationary still have to toil through the smell as they slowly ascend to the top.
Dude, I rode the subway to work today and pulled a Colorado Cropduster as I ascended up the exit escalator. The smell hovered and at least 20 people had to walk through it to get to where they were going. How about that for a special morning treat!
by Stagmen November 3, 2017
A one-time trick that you play on someone who is clueless to your mischieviousness. Ask the clueless person if you have a hole in the seat of your pants because it feels breezy. When the person looks and says no ask the person to look closer. When they get closer to your butt, unsuspectingly looking for a hole, you let out a good old stinky fart!
He is so stupid. I did the Dutch Inquiry on him. He put his face right by my ass looking for the hole and I let out the noxious fumes of a burrito fart.
by Stagmen April 23, 2017
Banging an ugly woman without having to look at OR listen to her and picturing a beautiful woman in her place. The two bagger and some tape involves tape for over her mouth so you don't hear her talking during the deed, a bag for over her head so you don't have to look at her, and a bag for over your head in case the one over hers breaks.
Dude, how did the date go with that annoying girl, who had the face that looked like an old shoe? Oh my god, she was not just a two bagger. She was a two bagger and some tape. She was so annoying to talk to, and so ugly, but I needed to get laid so bad that I simply put some tape over her mouth, put bags on both of our heads. I then did the deed while picturing young Pamela Anderson's tits and ass.
by Stagmen October 3, 2017
Legally tugboat is like "Legally Blond" but without and blond and with the tugboat: meaning smart, short, ugly, and fat. She is type of girl your friend sets you up with by saying "she had a nice personality!" Like a tugboat, she looks like she wears a couple of tires around her waist the prevent hip damage!!!!!
Hey man, how did that date go the other night with that girl? Well, she never sent me a body shot, but when I met her, she was "legally tugboat!" Meaning, she went to law school, but was the ugliest chick there; nevertheless my cock thrusts were absorbed by her tire buffers and I blew a load all over her face!
by Stagmen June 6, 2021
A person who pillages and plunders any penis-shaped vegetable so he can stick it up his own ass or the ass of his pirated partner
Dude, he is hanging out with all the chicks, why? Dude, he is not a threat to them, since he is a zucchini pirate looking only for homo vegetable play friends, arg!!!
by Stagmen March 29, 2017
When you press your butt against a hard, flat-surfaced chair and fart, but there is no place for the gas to escape except up the crack of your ass. and out at the top.
Dude, I laid the biggest periscope fart in detention. I press my butt cheeks against the hard chair and farted and the gas came bubbling up the crack of my ass and peeked out at the top!
by Stagmen June 20, 2017