Squid Wrangler's definitions
A member of the tremendous battalion of lame New Jersey post-hardcore/power pop/blargh/pseudo-genre bending radio-friendly over-produced bands that have recently broken into the American mainstream in an unexpected manner. One of the many bands who are worshipped by legions of former preps who now wear studded belts, Chuck Taylors, and check their Myspace account every six minutes. Fans of My Chemical Romance are usually in-between everything. They're too "refined" to like Linkin Park, Korn, and other ultra-mainstream angst-peddlers but too dense and flat to really do much more than haphazardly dabble in bands that are somewhat more challenging to get into, such as pre-"Dark Side of the Moon" Pink Floyd and Sonic Youth.
My Chemical Romance is mainly at home in combining the sad-sack tendencies of emo lyrics and the overbearing self-absorption found therein (yes I know they're not emo you fucking idiots, emo is a very specific style of music that for all practical purposes has been dead for a few years. But you're truly a moron if you don't think they at least borrow some elements of that genre) with the overdone theatrics of prog rock and metal while having absolutely none of the virtuosity associated with those genres. Makes use of the same limp musicianship that is present in every other generic "dynamic" or "emotional" (short for "not really good at anything") rock band currently making 16 year old girls with glasses and acne cream their pants across the country.
Speaking of their lyrics, this band is nothing special when compared to their peers while absolutely awful compared to somewhat decent bands. One of the "good songs" another person mentioned in another definition contains the following lyrics:
" And if they get me and the sun goes down into the ground
And if they get me take this spike to my heart and
And if they get me and the sun goes down
And if they get me take this spike and
You put the spike in my heart
And if the sun comes up will it tear the skin right off our bones
And then as razor sharp white teeth rip out our necks I saw you there
Someone call the doctor, someone get me to a church
Where they can pump this venom gaping hole
And you must keep your soul like a secret in your throat
And if they come and get me
You put the spike in my heart"
Good God. Nothing but lame, weak metaphors about hearts, souls, secrets, gaping holes in all three, and other asinine, pretentious bullshit that is showcased in most songs in this God-forsaken genre. Overblown, meandering pablum that doesn't really even mean anything.
My Chemical Romance is mainly at home in combining the sad-sack tendencies of emo lyrics and the overbearing self-absorption found therein (yes I know they're not emo you fucking idiots, emo is a very specific style of music that for all practical purposes has been dead for a few years. But you're truly a moron if you don't think they at least borrow some elements of that genre) with the overdone theatrics of prog rock and metal while having absolutely none of the virtuosity associated with those genres. Makes use of the same limp musicianship that is present in every other generic "dynamic" or "emotional" (short for "not really good at anything") rock band currently making 16 year old girls with glasses and acne cream their pants across the country.
Speaking of their lyrics, this band is nothing special when compared to their peers while absolutely awful compared to somewhat decent bands. One of the "good songs" another person mentioned in another definition contains the following lyrics:
" And if they get me and the sun goes down into the ground
And if they get me take this spike to my heart and
And if they get me and the sun goes down
And if they get me take this spike and
You put the spike in my heart
And if the sun comes up will it tear the skin right off our bones
And then as razor sharp white teeth rip out our necks I saw you there
Someone call the doctor, someone get me to a church
Where they can pump this venom gaping hole
And you must keep your soul like a secret in your throat
And if they come and get me
You put the spike in my heart"
Good God. Nothing but lame, weak metaphors about hearts, souls, secrets, gaping holes in all three, and other asinine, pretentious bullshit that is showcased in most songs in this God-forsaken genre. Overblown, meandering pablum that doesn't really even mean anything.
by Squid Wrangler May 13, 2005
Get the My Chemical Romancemug. Fake, totally unintersesting porn site that has become extremely popular in some bizarre, metaphysical manner. Often credited with single-handedly starting the God-awful trend of "reality" porn sites. Follows the adventures of a handful of bad actors and general wankers employed by porn juggernaut Ox Entertainment. Can typically be seen in and around South Florida paying fat, used-up, coke-shooting skanks $700 to ride around in a van and get reamed by one of the ugly freaks of nature that resides therein. Even then, if you dare conjure up any semblence of an erection, it's usually quelled by a certain wheezing, giggling, cackling, totally obnoxious bastard going by the name of Dirty Sanchez. Very little is known about this mysterious individual, other than the fact that he insists on cracking bad jokes the entire time and seems to get off on random, amateurish zooming and panning. A bunch of equally stupid and low-quality porn sites that feature many of the same girls along with the same lame-brained actors are included as extras for those deluded enough to actually buy a subscription to this shitopia. Even worse than Milf Hunter.
"Hey baby gurrrr hahahahaha wanna like ga hahahaha like come ride with us? Hahahaha, dude, dude, dude!!"
-Dirty Sanchez
-Dirty Sanchez
by Squid Wrangler March 24, 2005
Get the Bang Busmug. by Squid Wrangler May 10, 2005
Get the Liberal Mediamug. by Squid Wrangler March 28, 2005
Get the Bush votermug. Want to see the future? Take any speech about foreign policy Bush made in late 2002/early 2003 and replace "Iraq" with "Iran".
by Squid Wrangler May 14, 2005
Get the Iranmug. Do you like D-list celebrities and small-time comics who couldn't even sell out the dive bar down the street? Do you like unfunny quips made by people so far under the radar that nobody cares what they think anyway? Do you need a one-stop resource for any and all news about Paris Hilton's week? "Best Week Ever" just might be for you, idiot.
by Squid Wrangler May 3, 2005
Get the Best Week Evermug. Woefully awful neo-retro blandness. Sounds like a bad Led Zeppelin tribute band taking their first shot at writing original material. Locked in a tight race with JET and the Vines to be the worst band to come out of Australia ever.
Wolfmother: Because the world needs more illiterate stoners with Down's Syndrome wailing like banshees.
by Squid Wrangler December 10, 2008
Get the wolfmothermug.