Sir Bartholomew McTavish's definitions

fuckmas

What Disney and all other "child" orientated businesses are doing to us at Christmas. Wishing us a 'Merry Fuckmas, you've just paid us £40 for a piece of shit, you stupid fucking moron. You keep this economy going and you buy our crap?'

At Eurodisney
DAD: Go say hi to Mickey son,
SON: Okay Dad. Hiya Mickey, we thought you were great in Steamboat Willy
MICKEY MOUSE COSTUME MAN:Fuck you kid, give me your watch, cash and toys. (punches kid in face and signs Dad's car in own feaces.) Merry Fuckmas assholes.

by Sir Bartholomew McTavish December 29, 2008

boil foiled

when a lady's or gentleman's underpant region become increasingly bothered, horny, moist, or brought to the boil a situation comes up which negates or foils the sensation.

A hard on boil that becomes foiled.

1: Watching late night TV for a bit of self loving when a picture of Karen Matthews, Cilla Black or Jade Goody comes on and your 'rock' becomes a 'flop'

2: When a lady is watching late night TV in the hopes that a bit of twisted gaymensex comes on and instead find nothing but Karen Matthews, Cilla Black and Jade Goody lezzing out.

3: Wanking over Britney when you realise you're her Dad.Boil Foiled.

by Sir Bartholomew McTavish April 11, 2008

baazing

When something really cool happens and no other words/phrases say it as well as.
Sometimes other words such as snap, wizard, awesome and boomshakalaka will do when baazing has been used too many times whilst watching Ladies Wimbledon or any fantastic lesbian threeway porno.

PATRICK: Sebastien, see that girl there by the photocopier?

SEBASTIEN: Yeah,that's Mark from Accounting's teenaged sister, I've heard she's harder to lay than a sixty foot Ostritch Egg.

PATRICK: Well I had some of that last night in the back of my Mazda.

SEBASTIEN: Baazing!

by Sir Bartholomew McTavish March 4, 2008

wangelina

To gain a wang-on while watching her in any of her nude happy films. Gia, Womb Raider, actually what else is she in?

Man#1: You see that new Tomb Raider flick?
Man#2: You mean the one with Wangelina
Man#1: High Five! (They high five.) Yeah..!

by Sir Bartholomew McTavish October 9, 2008

Ewan McFucker

Ewan McGreggor's character name from 'Angels and Demons' as opposed to the term Camerlengo, which although is Italian for 'Chamberlain', also happens to sound like a euphamism for someone's cock.

The character of Camerlengo Ewan McFucker will be played by none other than gay-icon Welsh actor, (trying to be Scottish) Ewan McGreggor, or as he's known to the whole universe, Obi-Wan Kenobi.

by Sir Bartholomew McTavish September 21, 2009

wankipediac

Someone, usually lazy wankers, who use Wikipedia to do homework, teachers to mark their student's coursework, politicians to find and pass dumb ass laws and what George Lucas looks at online all day while he makes $478.55 an hour doing fuck all.

Mum: Son, are you doing your homework?
Son: Yeah, I found the answers on the web
Dad: Fucking wankipediac.

by Sir Bartholomew McTavish October 18, 2008

OlgaBolger

Any stocky Austrian,German or Scottish women who should be right heffers but are so physically shaggable that she makes bits of all men bulge to near ejaculating proportions

Mike: Did you see that sixfoot, blonde, German babe from accounting?
Dave: Olga? Yeah, I think she could benchpress a truck.
Mike: Yeah, but she is quite fit.
Dave: She's over there now! Look at those nuggs.
Mike: I've just cum.
Dave: Me too.I've got an OlgaBolger in my grits too.

by Sir Bartholomew McTavish April 11, 2008