Samson III's definitions

Sylar

A villain in the popular TV series, "Heroes." He was told by the professor researching human evolution that he had gained no abilities through his genetic mutation. This professor then talked at length about the "evolutionary imperative" to survive. This drove Sylar mad with the need to prove his worth and specialness.

Sylar's genetic mutation actually endowed him with intuitive aptitude, the ability to recognize and manipulate patterns within complex systems. He uses this to recognize the powers of other evolved humans and replicate them, but only after cutting out their brains to perform some unknown process.

Sylar seized the evolutionary imperative. Shouldn't you?

by Samson III February 22, 2007

Angertainment

(n.) Something that is entertaining because of how pissed off it makes you. A treatment for the numbness brought on by the Internet Age.

Fred: I'm gonna head home and watch some O'Reilly.
Bill: But you hate O'Reilly. You're just gonna punch through your wall again.
Fred: I have to. Angertainment is the only thing that makes me feel alive anymore...

by Samson III September 30, 2008

pirate hooker

Noun. A female who travels with a large group of men, servicing each one of them in turn to placate the crowd. This term was created in honor of the brave women who traveled with pirate ships on long journeys, keeping them sane and satiated.

You: I'm going to hang out with the ENTIRE football team tonight!
Me: Pirate Hooker.
You: I take offense to that.
Me: Shut up hooker. Be proud of your heritage.

by Samson III December 28, 2005

precaf

Verb. To drink a caffeinated beverage before partaking of a more highly caffeinated beverage. Derived from the word "pregame," this act is often avoided due to its cheapening of the second caffeine buzz.

You: Hey, you wanna go grab some coffee?
Me: Alright, but I'm getting decaf.
You: What are you, some sort of pansy bitch?
Me: Naw dude, I'm drinking Monster later and I don't wanna precaf.

by Samson III July 22, 2008

w00f

Exclamation. Props given out by a l337 d0g.

Timmy: I just own3d that guy who was going around ganking n00bs.

Fido: w00f.

by Samson III June 11, 2006

carrion question

(n.) A question intended to gauge the life expectancy of a relationship that vaguely insinuates wishes for its end.

Carrion Questions:

How's your boyfriend?
Did he bring you flowers for your show?
Where are you going on your date?
What did he get you for Valentine's Day?

by Samson III October 17, 2006

Blang

Verb. To telephone or call.

Blang me later.

Hold up, I'm getting blanged.

by Samson III October 6, 2005