The crap school you go to if the oh-so elite University of Pennsylvania rejects you. UPenn kids do drink and have lives and obviously have the better campus, since it's in the city with good restaurants and shops. Penn State has nothing on UPenn, largely because you can get in with a B-minus average and 1600/2400 SAT score while UPenn wants A students with 2100+ and multiple advanced placement courses. This is why if you confuse a UPenn kid with a Penn State kid, the UPenn kid will want to punch you in the face. If you want to have to list "loser" as your occupation for the rest of your life, go here.
UPenn kid: Yes! Going to Wharton of UPenn has helped me land a great job at alumni Donald Trump's firm! Half a mill starting salary, baby!
Penn State kid: Uhhhh. Dooo doo. Do you want fries with that? How about extra mayonnaise on your Filet O' Fish sammich?