The roomate you dread-they act how the name sounds...gay-o. they will live on your xbox and never ask for permission, and pester you endlessly while u play it. You will probably be driven to password protect your xbox, a sad sad day indeed. worse comes to worse, hide the powercord, lest the bastard child wakes u up at ungodly hours with the same shitty guitar hero song that he plays over and over. message in a bottle is a good song and all, but come on. 693 times in a row? you douchebag!
most likely, he's fat and/or pudgy, with what is known as "bitch titties." He's the kinda kid who would wear a t-shirt in the water at the beach...you know, the person too ashamed to let their "bitch titties
" flop out in public. This is the kinda kid whos bed you want to move into the bathroom, just to get him the fuck away from you. god forbid he get's a girlfriend, or you will never hear the end of it because he thinks he might get some from whatever butch ass sasquatch looking bitch. chewbacca has better features than this unholy bitch, or so u can assume. you don't have to see, u just know...
his facebook will probably be the most humiliating thing you've ever seen. when u frantically look him up to see who your new roomate is, you will cry to yourself when u see the scene
looking webcam shot, complete with shitty resolution and strange color/contrast effects. if you see this, drop out. theres always truck driving school. it'll be complete with the long, oddly greasy blacker than black hair. beware, this shit sheds EVERYWHERE... your shower drain will turn into a swirling pile until it forms a small mountain of disgust.
in public he will be unbearable. this devil child will act like the shittiest cartoon character u have ever seen-a tribute to sub-"3 stooges" slapstick, the slightest bump in the elevator, scuff on a floor, or other minute daily effect that most normal folks let go will cause a sporadic reaction, generally followed by a cackling enjoyment at his own "humor." at random points in time he will purr...yes, PURR. but not like a normal cat, more like a sexual deviant
would to a child at a bustop...
also, you know u have a geyo when he tries to act like his ancient ancestorial ninjas, or whatever the fuck gets into his twisted mind....no, you are not athletic, you are not a fighter, sit the fuck down and calm down tubby, go eat a fucking rice crispy treat bastard, rather than scream noises in my face and "karate chop" me. best defense, cold cock his ass in his already punched-in, fucked up looking face.
will probably show it in some strange way...be it wear mittens while biking so his hands dont get "hurt" or "sore," because god forbid he cant wack it in the bathroom that night with a blister.
apparently, geyos travel in packs...they will bring their loud, obnoxious, and painfully irritating friends to your room at obscene hours of the night or inopportune times. for all we know, they are probably all furries
....which leads to my next thought. anime
don't bring your tv, for they will take it and constantly watch anime. even if u dont, theres no avoiding the loud blaring anime theme music that will resonate in your eardrums until you gouge them out with a plastic spoon. the situation is beyond all hope if the listen to a band called "made in mexico
". if they do, run. dont look back, dont pack, just abandon it all and run.
you probably find youself in a similar situation as described above. you figure, hey, im better than that, ill just ignore it. the sad thing is, many have tried, but almost all have failed...this asshole will push u to limits u never thought u had. u thought u were a tolerant and accepting person? think again...bitch tits will bring u down faster than the hair falling out of his head onto everything u own. if you have a roomate who has ANY of the the traits listed, get out fast. it may save ur soul.