not just whipped cream and cherries, although food fetishists will disagree! red bras have almost no part to play, unless it's ordered that you wear one. anything that goes against the norm of sex - so oral, anal, masturbation and titwanks aren't kinky.
think handcuffs, blindfolds, rope, leather, chains, spreader bars and anything that would shock the vicar and go from there, right on up to forced feminisation, scat (shit play), needles and knives. anything involving dead people necrophilia
, animals bestiality
and children paedophilia
ISN'T kinky. not only are those acts illegal - they're also sick.
last night i was blindfolded, tied to a st andrews cross and flogged. now THAT is kinky.