Pete Dick's definitions

land banking

a technique used by wealthy individuals to frustrate their rivals by buying up land adjacent to their competitors locations so that they can open up competing busineses and perhaps force them out of business.

TP: "Did you hear Pete Dick got us banned from the Kirk Hotel? Now we got no place to go."
The Cooker: "Yeah but before he did that he was land banking and plans to open up a place even better down the road."
TP: "well, I guess that is why they call him Pete Dick."
The Cooker: "shut up and Irish yourself."

by Pete Dick March 21, 2008

autograt

a tip that is included as a charge on a restaurant bill rather than left to a diner's discretion.

The Cooker: "those fuckers just took off without leaving the bartender a tip."
Pete Dick: "well, not really, they just think they did, I could see that based on their ethnicity that they were not going to leave her anything so I told her to put on an autograt."
Bartender: "you guys were right, I owe you a free pitcher."

by Pete Dick March 21, 2008

budget dust

money that is said to be insignificant when compared to other, usually planned, expenditures.

Pete Dick: "There is my sister's ex-boyfriend Robertto, lets go over and say hi, he will buy us a drink."
Robertto: "Hey Pete, how are you?"
Pete Dick: "let me buy you a drink."
Robertto: "Please, put your money away I will get you a drink."
Pete Dick: "Robertto, how do you afford to do this, you must be an international man of leisure..."
Robertto: "what, these drinks, this is budget dust for me compared to how much money your sister used to make me pay for dill does and other sex toys!"
The Cooker: "I heard that about her!"
Robertto (laughing): "Yeah, I really broke her heart when I dumped her, sorry Pete."
Pete Dick: "Forget about it, baby bubba, we are still friends, just shut up and Irish yourself."

by Pete Dick March 21, 2008

social noise

the general background noise found at concerts, nightclubs, restaurants and other events where groups of people gather.

The Cooker: "I saw you jacking for beats last night, you get any?"
Pete Dick: "No, I couldn't work my magic because the girl couldn't hear me over the social noise."
The Cooker: "damn, that sucks"
Pete Dick: "shut up and Irish yourself"

by Pete Dick March 28, 2008

marathon dump

an abnormally long, difficult bowel movement.

The Cooker: "damn, where is tp? He went to the can an hour ago."
Pete Dick: "I dunno, maybe he is playing gay games..."
TP (returning from the bathroom, looking relieved: "Oh, wow."
The Cooker: "what the fuck took you so god damn long?"
TP: "marathon dump dude, you know my wife won't let me crap in the house. that thing has been brewing all week."
Pete Dick: "shut up and Irish yourself."

by Pete Dick March 30, 2008

Griffin Book

published by Griffin Investigations and containing photos, listed individuals are generally suspected of being, or known to be, either advantage players or outright cheaters at casino games. These individuals are perceived as a threat to a casino's profits and include those who use leal and illegal means including card counters, card markers, and those who attempt to cheat slot machines.

The Cooker: "damn, that dude bettin all that cash just got kicked out of the casino."
Pete Dick: "must be in the Griffin Book."

by Pete Dick March 30, 2008

boobie trap

when a man gets caught up with a woman who is not good for him for some reason, but cannot escape her because of her abnormally sexy body.

TP: "Man, I just can't stop seeing that call girl."
Pete Dick: "Dude, you are caught in the boobie trap."

by Pete Dick March 31, 2008