You know those freaks that used to only come out at night? Yeah, they're on the web now and they brag about how many friends they have. They're all ugly, emo, fat, disgusting, 14-year-old whores who do those famous camera-trick-shot-things to make themselves look more fabulously slutty than they really are so people like Brian Peppers can kidnap them and molest them. Not his fault, though, they asked for it for being so whorish. Most don't change facial expressions. All are stupid and deserve to die. Except for Joe Don Baker. He's cool. When dealing with a hordes of myspace junkies it's a good idea to bring your own weapons. Be sure to use caution around myspace addicted whores, your safety is not guaranteed. I've only done this once before.
Myspace turdburglar: "Lol, I have 9,344,323 friends on myspace!"
Sane Person: "O rly?"
Myspace turdburglar: "Ya rly, you should sign up for a myspace!"
Sane Person: "Why should I sign up for yourspace when I have my own personal space. Your stupidity is leaking into it. BEGONE!" *PUNCH*
Myspace turdburglar (with a broken nose): "OW! I'm gonna write a nasty blog about you and have my elevendy-billion friends comment on how you're a pansy because you don't have a myspace."
Sane Person: "I thought you said you had 9,344,323 friends."
Myspace turdburglar (with a broken nose): "I'm sure more people want to be friends since I last logged in three minutes ago." *leaves to write angry blog*
Sane Person: "Turd Burglar. I hope he eats a bag of hell."
Joe Don Baker: Where can I find me some bacon, butter, pancakes, steak, eggs, cheese, fries, cheesy fries, pizza, beer, hamburgers, butter, chili dogs, chili-cheese fries, fried chicken, waffles, corn dogs, an orange covered, with some beer and more butter?
February 27, 2006