P'tainz's definitions

oss

1. Posterior, buttocks, ass

(An intentional or unintentional mispronunciation of "ass." Derived from a slackish or lazy way of saying "ass," in which the "a" sound is more difficult than the easier-to-articulate long "o" sound.
Often misunderstood as a German pronunciation of "ass," due to the long "o" rather than "a" sound.
Often confused with the acronym OSS, Official of Strategic Services.
Believed to have been orginated in northeastern Nebraska by a number of smalltown youths indulgin in alcohol.)

You best watch you'self or I'm gonna kick your oss.

by P'tainz June 30, 2011

lil' puss

1. (noun) A weakling or a meek individual; one perceived as being weak either in physical prowess or character

syn.: fairy, pussy, faggot, pansy, sissy

2. (noun) A term of endearment, normally used to address either a young child or an intimate female friend by a male person

syn.: dear, sweetie, honey, lovey, bitts

1. "That bitch won't stop cryin'. Damn, he ain't nothin' but a lil' puss."

2. "Hey, lovey. You're my sweet lil' puss.

by P'tainz January 23, 2013

Lamp Kloon

1. (n.) A clown who has generally failed at his craft; a clown who finds it difficult to get laughs from an audience or who can no longer adequately perform his standard tricks, such as juggling, dancin', harpin' the rug, or stountin' the tarn.

2. (n.) A floundering can that commonly rests on a lamp or lamp shade.

1. That lamp kloon really sucked, and so I gave him a good kick to the nuts.

2. There's a lamp kloon.

by P'tainz January 28, 2013

Anglo-Saxon Saxaphone

A meaningless term, normally used by morons, idiots, dimwits and dorks, to refer to Anglo-Saxons, revealing a lack of intelligence and mental creativity in the person who says it. Initially used as a term in the mid to late 1980s by Kempke when his English teacher was discussing Anglo-Saxons, wherefor he turned to Skoudas and said laughingly, "Anglo-Saxon Saxaphone! Anglo-Saxon Saxaphone!"

Kempke, laughing, and with a red face, turned his half-hearted attention away from the teacher to face Skuodas and in a hardly concealed voice, whispered loudly, "Anglo-Saxon saxaphone! Anglo-Saxon saxaphone!"

by P'tainz October 7, 2010

baws

Balls (testicles, nuts); the way a bum utters the word "balls." A slackish fashion in which to say the word "balls." Such a pronunciation denotes two things: 1. the speaker is using the common slang term for testicles (the term in not used to refer to objects such as baseballs, basketballs, etc.); and 2. the speaker is slack-jawed, speaking in an overly oafish or relaxed fashion, thus the alteration of the standard pronunciation.

Oh my baws.

by P'tainz October 7, 2010

On the Rand

(adj.) A term which describes an amorous individual or a horny (slang) person. Of a person whose actions are dictated by an amorous disposition; the term can describe either the (1) individual or the (2) action.

Of an action occuring (or of the person performing the action) of which the ultimate goal is to get laid.

1. Dude, did you see Bainz gettin' all over Polls? He is completely on the Rand.

2. Swain's attempt to get Suzy in the car was totally on the Rand.

by P'tainz September 17, 2013

B.T.

(n.) acronym for "big tits"; only acceptable for use when interchangable with one's name, as if a nickname, i.e. used only in the place of a name, specifically that of a female with large breasts (exs.: inappropriate use - That woman has B.T.; appropriate use - I have a date with B.T.)

When Bainz called me, it soon became apparent he was checking to see how my night with B.T. had gone.

by P'tainz February 12, 2013