An ass monkey is a common species of primate known to live in the rectum of people that enjoy making others suffer. These people then gain superhuman powers that allow them to torment innocents even further... Some common "victims" of ass monkies are (but not limited to) DMV workers, lawyers, prosecuters, ex-significant others and high school teachers. Many also believe that George Bush is an ass monkey victim...
How to tell if you're an ass monkey:
- Do people avoid you?
- Do you live alone?
- Do little girls and old ladies run away from you in tears?
- Does your neighbor's dog crap on your doorstep?
- Do people flip you off on a regular basis?
...Damn that ass monkey at the DMV... That jerk wouldn't renew my permit even though i had all my ID...