19 definitions by Mr. Softey

Money a prostitute makes from performing anal sex acts, as in getting cornholed.
whore #1: I don't think I can sit down after what that last John did to me!

whore#2: Whatchoo gonna do 'bout it?

whore#1: Child, I'm taking this cornbread and getting me some Tucks.

whore#2: Shee-oot!
by Mr. Softey January 25, 2009
Interrupting a loved one's slumber with the sudden placement of one's testicles into their mouth.

A combination of the teabag with the alarm cock method.
"There's nothing quite like a saggy-scrotumed Wake Up Ball to start the day off right!"

"Here's your 2am Wake Up Ball, you nut-gargling whore!"

"Got any tic tacs? This morning's Wake Up Ball wasn't exactly minty fresh."
by Mr. Softey January 23, 2009
Disposable Visa gift cards used for the sole purpose of buying porn on the internet and not having Cornhole.com show up on your credit card statement.
<< Hey dude, you accidentally threw away your credit card.
>> Don't sweat it bro, that's just some used up MILF money!
by Mr. Softey February 03, 2009
An exclamation one yells out when, upon turning on the telly, you are unpleasantly surprised by the presence of a horrid Jean-Claude Van Damme movie.
"Jean-Claude God Damn! I give one lousy thumbs up to a Chuck Norris flick, and now my Tivo is infested with this asshole!"

"Jean-Claude God Damn! If they rerun Timecop one more time I'm going on a killing spree"

by Mr. Softey January 23, 2009
Filling a plastic spoon with the syrup from canned peaches and launching it on the unsuspecting lunchroom.
Mauro: For the love of God! Mystery meat and peaches again!

Heath: Grab your umbrella, because the forecast calls for the extremely unheralded return of the Peach Rain!

Mauro: Say what now?

Heath: Incoming!

Mauro: God, I love the smell of Peach Rain in the morning!

Heath: True dat!

Mauro: Word to my niggas!

Heath: Say What now?
by Mr. Softey January 25, 2009
A metaphor for anal sex.
"If Janelle has a few more Cosmos, I might be going to the 'ol Pop Shoppe later."

"No honeymoon is complete without a trip to the Pop Shoppe."

"It's my birthday and I pray to god the Pop Shoppe is open tonight!"
by Mr. Softey January 23, 2009
When you reverse tit fuck an Asian girl, same as a Cincinnati Bowtie, but with an Asian slant to it, if you will.
How about we head to my place for drinks and a little Cincinnati Pad Thai?
>>Me love you long time, Joe!
by Mr. Softey January 28, 2009

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