Monkey's Dad's definitions

OMC

Shock at testing positive for the Omicron variant of Covid.

"I sincerely hope you're fully vaccinated"
"Who? Me? ... Why?"
"Your test came back positive. But relax. It will only kill you if you're unvaccinated,"
"OMC"
"OMG! Please tell me..."
"I mean... I figured... if Marjorie Taylor Greene didn't get the shot... or wear a mask... no need, right?"

by Monkey's Dad December 31, 2021

XYZnophobia

Fear of a broad array of foreigners.

Today he was blaming the Chinese for the 'foreign virus', yesterday, the Mexicans for allowing the Central Americans to get anywhere near our border, and whom he might fear tomorrow was anyone's guess. The president actually seemed proud of his XYZnophobia, blind to the leveling properties of the pandemic, and the lesson it offered, that we are all made of the same stuff.

by Monkey's Dad March 22, 2020

fie

"feeling it everywhere" - a gently intimate way of letting someone know they have gotten you aroused.

'missing your tongue, counting the minutes' she texted him.
He replied, 'fie', and he was.

by Monkey's Dad November 5, 2022

Silent Spring

The title of a non-fiction account, published in 1962, of the environmental damage caused by pesticides, written by Rachel Carson, with great foresight.

"Silent Spring" carried eerie echoes, he thought, seeing the trees outside his window beginning to flower, the earth returning to life in a largely silenced human world. Spring of 2020 would be a season of great and unsettling quietude.

by Monkey's Dad March 30, 2020

Psychitis

A variant of psychosis. An episode of psychic inflammation. A brief if intense appearance of being totally off-the-wall psychotic.

His face reddened, his eyes and neck tendons bulging, he screamed into her astonished face, "Don't call me psychotic! Because that makes me crazy. I'm just psychitic! It's psychitis! Look it up in Urban Dictionary!"

by Monkey's Dad September 23, 2022

A Head of Esteem

In facing a challenging goal, the confidence that you are good enough to do it.

She'd give it a shot, but first she needed to work up a head of esteem.

by Monkey's Dad October 5, 2022

The Religious Left

Liberals who have their own definition of "the right to life".

Unlike members of the Religious Right, the Religious Left doesn't advocate ripping children from their mother's arms and putting them in cages, putting prisoners to death when witnesses have recanted and they have been refused the legal admission of DNA exoneration, or the necessity of carrying assault rifles into church. Just sayin'.

by Monkey's Dad March 12, 2020