Monkey's Dad's definitions
A long-awaited collaboration from the creators of Mad Men and Breaking Bad - Matthew Weiner and Vince Gilligan. Millions of homebound fans, desperate for a new binge, are hoping TV history will be made.
Don Draper sees the writing on the wall - a third of the storefronts on Madison Avenue are vacant. Realizing that in Covid-depressed America there is not much left to advertise, not much to buy and little reason to buy it, he goes in search of Jesse Pinkman, and the temptation of Breaking Mad.
by Monkey's Dad December 27, 2020
Get the Breaking Madmug. Wanting what is best for everyone, including oneself, not, as commonly believed, what is best only for oneself.
He knew it was in his self-interest to help as many people as possible thrive and prosper, in comfort and safety, that only then could he ultimately thrive and prosper.
by Monkey's Dad May 13, 2020
Get the self-interestmug. "My Little Puddle in the Bed": When texted, an intimate erotic endearment, eclipsing the historic 'Ma Petite Chou-Fleur", (my little cauliflower,) and leaving the fabled Frenchman distinctly in second place
by Monkey's Dad November 21, 2022
Get the mlpitbmug. He listened respectfully at first, filled with compassion, tears forming in his eyes as she narrated having been abandoned as an infant, left in a dumpster high in the Sierra-Nevadas, rescued by dumpster-diving circus riders who put her, untethered, on the back of a jumping stallion every night till she was sixteen. Years later, escaping one night off the coast of San Diego she waded into the ocean, hoping to end it all, only to be netted by Tijuana shrimp fishermen who forced her to peel shrimp for years in a rickety boat, the best life she's ever known, before falling overboard in a hurricane and washing ashore in San Francisco at the precise moment an 7.4 earthquake hit. How she got to the Greyhound station in Sparks she was still unclear, and could he spare a hundred bucks to help her find her rightful family, whom, she believed, might at this moment be remorsefully searching for her on the outskirts of Death Valley. By now dry-eyed and stone-hearted, he reached into his wallet for a five, which he slipped into the outer pocket of her spangled handbag and, not looking back, hopped quickly onto his bus while she prattled on with her Tale of Whoa!
by Monkey's Dad July 6, 2021
Get the Tale of Whoa!mug. To take an immaculately beautiful woman and, through blind applications of high-contrast streaks, razor-straight bangs, sharp 45-degree layered angles - phony fingernails which soon cover only half the natural nail and look like what exactly? - pounds of makeup, all of which which have zero to do with the real woman, her proportions, natural coloration or perfect essential beauty, and have everything to do with a state-wide communal aesthetic, n' toin huh intuh anuthuh cookie cuttuh Joisy Goil.
Underneath it all was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen or would ever see. Beautiful beyond words. All that had to be done was to simply reverse the NewJersification to which she had , stunningly, submitted .
by Monkey's Dad April 1, 2023
Get the NewJersificationmug. America after the fall became a peregrination, so many souls, trying to find their way back to a life that once was and would never again be.
by Monkey's Dad March 13, 2020
Get the peregrinationmug. Foretelling COVID-19 and its social distancing, forty years early. Precognitive lyrics from Steely Dan's 1980 hit.
by Monkey's Dad April 25, 2020
Get the Hey Nineteenmug.