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Maxwell Dope's definitions

the shitterbug

(noun) the awkward dance you do in front of the toilet in a public restroom because you’re trying to set up TP on the toilet seat but it keeps autoflushing and sucking everything in, so you try to set up as quickly as possible while maintaining your presence in front of the sensor
Max: You know when a public restroom has a toilet with an autoflush sensor and you're trying to set up a toilet paper buffer on the seat before you sit down and it keeps autoflushing and sucking all your paper into the toilet before you finish setting up, so you do that awkward move where you're trying to keep your body in front of the sensor while moving as fast as possible to get set up before the autoflush buzzer? I fucking hate that. I wish there was a word for that stupid little dance instead of having to explain the whole thing every time.

Tim: Oh, you mean the shitterbug.

Max: Damn, did you just make that up on the spot?!

Tim: Yeah.

Max: You’re a pun god.
by Maxwell Dope January 13, 2014
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THE SALAD GLOVE®

(noun) a glove, developed by the band Andrew Jackson Jihad, that is used to eat salad whilst avoiding dangerous forks and messy cleanups
(noun) a useful eating utensil that is latex-free and one-size-fits-all
(noun) an easy and clean tool that enables you to FIST FUCK YOUR HUNGER™
(noun) that shit you can buy that, along with your iPod, you can sell to Bookmans when your wife dies and you lose your job (from the song People II: Still Peoplin' by Andrew Jackson Jihad)
**Tuesday 1:30pm - Two young men are sitting in a corner booth at Denny's - Max is frustrated with his Caesar salad**

Max: I know I'm being a bitch, but don't you think eating croutons with a fork is next to impossible and fucking annoying?
Tim: Dude, you need THE SALAD GLOVE®.
by Maxwell Dope November 14, 2013
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the McRuns

The medical condition known by doctors as diarrhea which comes as a direct result of a late-night McRun.
Max: Holy shit Tim! We shouldn't have gone on that McRun last night!

Tim: What's the matter?

Max: That McRun gave me a NASTY case of the McRuns!!
by Maxwell Dope November 9, 2013
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drop a Mick

(verb) to take a trip late at night to a shitty fast food restaurant because nothing better is open; (verb) to go on a McRun
Max: Tim, you hungry?
Tim: Yeah, but nothing's open.
Max: Wanna drop a Mick?
Tim: Yeah, a McRun actually sounds pretty good right now.
Max: McDonalds or Taco Bell?
Tim: Micky D's. Taco Bell always gives me the McRuns!
by Maxwell Dope November 11, 2013
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banana code

(verb) to use 4011 at a self-service checkout machine to weigh out more expensive items at the going rate of bananas (typically $0.59/lb in 2013, future readers must adjust accordingly for inflation)

(noun) the PLU (product look-up) code for bananas; (noun) the number 4011 that a shopper must use to weigh bananas in the self-service checkout aisle
**At Walmart using self-service checkout machine**

Max: Fuck, this beef jerky is pricey!
Tim: Just banana code it.
Max: Just huh?
Tim: Give it here.

**Frustrated, Tim grabs the beef jerky, places it on the scanner, clicks produce, types in 4011, then throws it in the bag**

Max: What the?!
Tim: You've honestly never banana coded? Were you born yesterday?
Max: So my jerky is only 33 cents?!
Tim: (unimpressed) Yeah.
by Maxwell Dope November 13, 2013
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catch-me-if-you-can

(verb) to con your way into a job/role/situation like Leonardo DiCaprio's character in the movie "Catch Me If You Can"
**At the grocery store, Max is comparing prices to find the cheapest oatmeal. Tim stands by.**

Max: This is bullshit. I need a job.
Tim: I think they're hiring for cashiers here.
Max: Meh. I want a GOOD job. I'll just catch-me-if-you-can my way into being a doctor or something.
Tim: Do it.

**Four months later, "Dr. Max" is arrested and charged for manslaughter, but is set free by "Warden Tim" who catch-me-if-you-canned his way into an interesting new career.**
by Maxwell Dope November 18, 2013
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McRun

The shameful and disappointing trip a person must take to a shitty fast food restaurant in the middle of the night when there are no better options available.
Max: "Hey, Tim. I'm starving. Let's go eat."
Tim: "Nah man. Nothing's open."
Max: "McRun?"
Tim: "Down."
by Maxwell Dope November 8, 2013
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