Someone you rarely hang out with: "Hey, want to have a zoom call tonight?"
You: "Sorry! I can't."
Someone you rarely hang out with: "Why not? It's not like you can go out."
You: "I know, but I'm practicing virtual social distancing."
You: "Sorry! I can't."
Someone you rarely hang out with: "Why not? It's not like you can go out."
You: "I know, but I'm practicing virtual social distancing."
by Little Walnut March 31, 2020
Get the Virtual Social Distancingmug. What you feel when you watch a documentary about climate change and remember all the crap you just ordered online.
"Wow, this episode of Patriot Act is really disturbing. I had no idea fast fashion was creating so much waste. Hey, are you okay? You look like you're going to throw up."
"Yeah... just thinking about the 10 shirts I don't need that'll be arriving on my doorstep tomorrow and having some serious retail guilt. I'm an asshole."
"Yeah... just thinking about the 10 shirts I don't need that'll be arriving on my doorstep tomorrow and having some serious retail guilt. I'm an asshole."
by Little Walnut December 03, 2019
Get the Retail Guiltmug. When you do someone a favor and they insist on thanking you by taking you to lunch and completely disrupting your day.
"Thank you so much for lending me your pen."
"It was nothing, really."
"Let me take you to lunch to thank you properly."
"Seriously, it's not necessary."
"When is it convenient for you?"
"Never."
"Oh, come on. I'm sure you can make time."
"No means no! You're trying to force lunch me!"
"It was nothing, really."
"Let me take you to lunch to thank you properly."
"Seriously, it's not necessary."
"When is it convenient for you?"
"Never."
"Oh, come on. I'm sure you can make time."
"No means no! You're trying to force lunch me!"
by Little Walnut November 15, 2013
Get the Force Lunchmug. "Hey, how you doing?"
"Not great. I've had three colds this month, I'm broke, I'm not getting laid, I've gained thirty pounds, and the whole world is falling apart."
"Yeah... shit's hard, man."
"Not great. I've had three colds this month, I'm broke, I'm not getting laid, I've gained thirty pounds, and the whole world is falling apart."
"Yeah... shit's hard, man."
by Little Walnut October 03, 2017
Get the Shit's Hardmug. The mysterious phenomenon that occurs only when walking a dog at night, involving poo traveling sometimes several inches, sometimes several feet from where you just saw the dog poop. This phenomenon necessitates a flashlight and a thorough search of the ground before discovering the new location of the poo.
"Good dog, Buddy. Yep. Poop it out. That's right. Okay, just gotta pick this poop up and then we can . . . where did it go? Damn you, telepootation!"
by Little Walnut August 25, 2018
Get the Telepootationmug.