8 definitions by Kick ass action kung fu grippin bastard ass

Top Definition
FIGHT CLUB! thats all I have to say. Your not suppouse to talk about it but still. HEre we go. THIS MOVIE was created by a genius. The cinematic feature is none other but art. The way the screen play comes into action, the fight scenes are a work of GOD and the Story plot is something from heaven. This movie is worth
seeing over a hundred times until your sick from watching it.....AND THEN REWINDE IT and watch it a hundred times more. I am Jacks colon. FIGHT CLUB a work of God.
"We're the middle children of history.... no purpose or place. We have no Great War, no Great Depression. Our great war is a spiritual war. Our great depression is our lives."-Tyler Durden

"I felt like destroying something beautiful." -Jack

We've all been raised on television to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars. But we won't. And we're slowly learning that fact. And we're very, very pissed off." - Tyler Durden
Morals, what do we as humans know of what morals are. We know absolutley nothing besides what the bible gives us. Morals are not DOING GOOD THINGS UNTO OTHERS or trying to do good in the world. Morals are a strict code you set up for yourself to follow. Something you wont and cannot break. MORALS are something you develope or DO NOT DEVELOPE over time. Sadly, many men and women now adays have not developed any morals and are like animals, here to breed and prey on their natural instincts.
Zane: Micah, where have todays morals gone

Micah: To hell in a handbasket. Hopefully God will avenge his morals that no one has any more and people will eventually get the point.
Legend has it, that a man BY THE NAME OF Stewart Weatherbee, grew up with a condition only known as chodeinflamia. His chode became swollen and the only way the doctors could make it go down was for them to come up behinde him and grab him from behind, reach under and grabbing his manhood, PICK HIM UP and make him bounce up and down. This released the fluid from his chode into a sack that they cald the "Chode Holder". Soon kids began doing it to eachother in a little place called Owensboro Kentucky (Where Stewart was from) and they called it the ChodelHoldel. It is commonly known as a joke from kids at "Brothers Una Pizza".
So I was just standing there and some kid came up behind me and before I could even think about it, BAM, Chodelholdel. Man it sucks.
Oscar the Grouch, commonly remembered on Sesame Street, was a green fuzzy little man that lived in a trash can. The truth about this man is hard to comprehend.Oscar "The Grouch" Mantoothe III, was actually a pleasent young man that grew up in London, England. As a youngster he lost his Father (the II) to an outbreak of the plauge, commonly known as the "Black Death". After losing his beloved father, Mantoothe (being the only male in his family) had to work day and night from the time he was 12 to the time he was 22. Mantoothe kept working (his job was but that of a mere fisherman) until he eventullay caught a gigantic sword fish that no one had ever seen before and sold it to the highest bidder. Soon after he quit working and found a woman trying to settle down.
Part one of two, please scroll down to see continuation
LEGAND has it that the ancient Aztecs worshiped a fertility god only known as "Chodhum". They made a "Totum Poll" but instead they called it the Chodum Poll. NOW it is a Joke between two kids in Kentucky named Kyle and Micah. They were driving down the road on a (christian) school field trip when Kyle looked at Micah and told him to write in the fog on the van window "Chodum Poll" so he did it and he got away with it.
Live Reenactment:

Kyle: Dude, write Chodum poll.

Micah: Okay

(Micah writes)
*Both laugh and point*
As Mantoothe began trying to settle down with a woman by the name of Julian Laockland, who was a woman from the slums of England, he ran into a snag. His mother, who had grown acustomed to the lifestyle of the rich forbade him to marry the beautiful, yet poor, Julian. This
Threw Oscar into a frenzy. He left his home, and money, and married Julian, never to see his mother again. He then eventually moved to the US (with his new wife and newer child, and became a hobo) and began his acting career. Making music along the way with hits such as "I'm Here to stay, in my garbage can", "Go fuck yourself Old York", and "I hate england". After living on the streets, gaining a new house from the music industry, he developed a sickness commonly known as "The Green Night", scientifically, known from the book of Terahaut Shillo Nextia, is known as Halifax Jinxed Grennhaim. Translated by
Frankie Two Tone as "The Green Wolf Syndrom", the doctors said there was nothing they could do. He would eventually be covered with green hair all over his body. There was a plus to this, they said he would live longer than any one else. Thousands of years. He became very sick one day and as the weeks passed he became fully covered in hair. His wife and now three children took very good care of him. And now he plays the Grouch part on Sesame Street. He is still very much alive. And yes, he is only in character as the Grouch. He actually a very Pleasent soul to live with. And in an interview he has this to say "I thank my beautiful wife and my beautiful children for keeping me alive. Even though they have passed on, I still love them." His family passed on and now he is a grouch from time to time, but he trys to stay loving because his wife always was. And his kids would have hated to see him grouchie.

He was a loving and devoted father and husband.
In a little town called owensboro, two men were at peace with all fake enforcers of the law at the "mall". UNTIL ONE DAY it all started. Micah and Cheeseburger knew all the security officers names except for one, and this man is satan. THUS we gave him a name we could think of. The most womanly name that came into our shallow minds. And it was Reba, thus the monster was born. Eventually getting his own arse fired. THAT DIRTY BASTARD!

As I was walking down the street, a particular madness came about me. I no longer knew where I was, I was lost into oblivion. I became a child of the void. As I stepped through the darkness, I saw two armies clashing, I saw the bodies, they were piled on top of each other. Screaming, I fled for my life. As soon as I knew it, I was thrust into the madness of combat, swords clashing over me head, bodies dropping to the ground. I saw the blood, dear gah the blood! I was afflicted with a madness that could only be cast down upon those who entered a state of the surreal. It seemed as if everything was going in slow motion, the battle was ceasing to a halt. As soon as I knew it, I was back at my house. However, ghostly apparitions, blood red with their eyes seeping with a despair that cannot be described. I felt my hair standing on end, as if they were going to be plucked out by the air itself. I ran and I ran, passed the fleshly, horrible walls of my entrapment. I did not know what to expect next, as Micah walked out of the bathroom and kicked me off of the computer :(.
"I'm only a minor, and you are causing me serious psycological damage, and I pee the bed at night because of you."-Micah

"OKAY BOYEEE! Reba. REBAAAAAAA! your threatening us, Reba." -Diamond.

"Can you trespass in a fucking mall?" -Nick

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