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JEUNT's definitions

turdstile

The anus. It is also know as the butthole, fecal dispenser, cigar cutter, the moist, poop chute, crap cooker, colon, fartbox, shit lips, sphincter, ol' crusty, etc.
Dude, I have to pass a loaf so bad that I can hear it. If I don't get to the toilet soon it will slide past the turdstile.
by JEUNT December 4, 2010
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Dunch

An abnormally time-consuming, large, pasty and often painful bowel movement. As a general rule, taking a dunch requires most of one's lunch break to pass loaf or loaves and finish the paperwork.
Q: "...Hey Bob, I'm going to that sushi joint with the girls from accounting. You wanna come?"

A: "...I'd love to but I have to take a horrendous dunch." I'll see you at the 3:00 meeting."
by JEUNT November 11, 2009
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Defecacy

1. An awful meal.
2. A food that literally tastes fecal.
3. A complex dish made with painstaking care but has catastrophically disappointing flavor.
4. Absolutely not a delicacy

The term is used so as not to offend the cook. Polite society tells us that it is rude to be brutally honest when asked how enjoyable a particular meal was. Polite society also tells us it is rude to correct someone's mispronounciation of a word. So, while you said "defecacy," he or she will think you meant "delicacy" but will be too polite to correct you. You can be honest say the meal tasted like a shit but the cook will believe you loved it. Everybody wins.
Q: "...So, did you like the chocolate-marshmallow & cheese meatloaf I made special just for you?"

A: "Uh - yeah, it was a real defecacy."
by JEUNT November 11, 2009
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chindex

A measure of obesity based on the number of chins on a person. It is quoted as a "chindex of..." or "chindex factor of" followed by a number. A single chin (chindex of 1) generally reflects a lack of obesity. A second chin (chindex factor of 2) suggests the individual is overweight. Chindices, the plural of chindex, that are greater than 2 indicate that the individual is a fat mess. A chindex of 0 suggests the individual lacks a jaw, probably from a medical condition or horrific incident. If you have a chindex of 0, you have a fucked-up lookin' face.
Q: Hey, did you hook up with that chick last night? She looked hot but I was pretty liquored up.

A: No, dude you must have been really fucked up. She was gastric-bypass big...she had a chindex of 5.
by JEUNT June 9, 2010
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