a completely self-absorbed, unaware "friend" (READ: douche) that you do things for *all the time* that NEVER returns the favor, even in times of crisis, always making the excuse that they're working or busy or just *can't* for whatever reason--always an excuse--ANY time you ask them, no matter what; someone who never returns the many favors you've done for them.
"My Dad just died and I can't find sittage for the funeral tomorrow. Since I've watched your kids for free for the past two days, do you think you can sit mine for a few hours while I go to my Dad's memorial service?"
Non-Reciprocating Tool: "Tomorrow? Oh, no way. Sorry. Gotta work online and stuff. You know. Busy and all. Can't. Maybe next time."
(noun) (1)reasoning assessed according to strict principles of validity as defined by a man's penis. (2)the total and complete lack of actual logical thinking when a man's thinking with his junk. (3)the mechanism by which a man's penis can completely erase any rationality or reasoning capability.
At 11:30pm on a Tuesday night, Mark is out with a guy friend. He has to be up at 6am to go to work to do hard manual labor for a 10-hour shift. He's married with two kids. An older unattractive sloppy-drunk woman wants to take him home for sex. With all the above information, PENIS LOGIC only says to him, "Hey--It's NEW" so he goes with her. He later loses his job, wife, kids, and most of his future income to alimony/child support.
(noun) being in a state of continually regretting a lapse in sexual judgment (EX: walk of shame)
"When I think about Vidal, I have an overwhelming sense of coitus regretus and want to forget it ever happened."
When a friend or relative posts a picture of themselves online that you know you were in originally but you've been cropped out. Being chopped out of a photo.
"Dude. She totally photo chopped your ass outta that pic."
(noun) violent, uncontrolled rage that overtakes you when an asshole in front of you in line at the store holds up everyone by writing an old-time paper check.
Some old bitch send me spiraling into check rage today at Safeway.
(noun) an insidious obnoxious person with questionable objectives meddling in your affairs; someone who doesn't know you at all but busts up on your business and starts saying crap, giving advice, acting like it's his business, as if he knows what to do (Douche + Carpet-bagger)
Sam was telling a story about his ex, Lori, at the party, and some total douchebagger bust up into the scene and went off.
Another (more realistic) name for Facebook, especially when their site runs like shit, notices don't go out, screens lock up, and their crappy server fails.
Thanks a lot for the lock-up, douchebook. FFS