1 definition by HIP-HOP Anonymous

Top Definition
Toms River is a place that seems to have nothing of any value to it other than lots of people and one Little League World Series title. Not to say that isn't a big deal but some of those kids could legitamately have their own kids now. When you tell someone that you live in TR they will ask or asume you play baseball or rattle off ten names of people in the 90,000 person town to see if you know them and if you dont they look at you like you must have lived under a rock. Other than that great sports achievement you would be hard pressed to find any pool of talent in any field from sports to everyday life. Screw teh otehr schools, everythign in TR boils down to the 3-4 high schools. Mon Don being the fourth and forgotten one. HS North, where to start. Might as well be a college campus. They get everything and if they dont have it they have enogh money to buy it and will. The kids there tend to be rich yes snobby superficial and generally better looking than everyone else. Not too bad if you happen to be them. HS East would be the younger sibling in the battle of the 3 high schools. They have everything North does but just less of it. One thing they do have more of is Italians. HS South is the poor retarded step child. They have pride and tradtion. Really South is just a school for burnouts. Any one can make a name for themselves there. Beachwood adds to South's declined wealth as does South Toms River, but STR is the only reason if any taht South does good at sports. No one really judges becasue they are either too dumb or too fucked up to take time to do it. Mon Don is just the private Catholic school that wear uniforms and learn about God or whatever but act like devils. They drink in the parking lot and ahh fuck it who cares no one counts them anyway. Sorry.
What do people do for fun. Well nothing, sadly. Anyone that claims to have a raging social life and also admits to being from toms river is a liar. Everyone has small groups of friends that usually hang out together either at someones house or partying at someone's house. Route 37 and Hooper are the two roads people will drive on just to feel alive and to see otehr people. I'm surprised TR isnt fatter because all people do is go to restaurants mainly applebees because they have half price appetizers but I think it's just to be seen out. You know let people know you are still alive. Sure there is Seaside, but what real entertainment is there on the boardwalk other than watching the pure fact that God has a sense of humor or that he has created some alternate universe with a different species on it that is only about an hour drive away. The boardwalk is just another form of applebees where you can be seen at. The beach is the same way except the beach is actually fun when the local kids arent working all day. Considering that the locals live here and dont vaction here I find that it is harder for locals to get to the beach than it is for actual vactioners. Its just a place for locals to look at each otehr with minimal clothing and stare at vactioners who barely wear anything. Many phone calls go as followed. Hey whats up? Wanna do something? Yeah. What do you want to do? I don't know what is there to do? I don't know wanna jsut come over. And 2 hours later your either at applebees or the boardwalk or wondering why the fuck you sat around the house like there was something better to do.
In TR you gotta make your fun and you gotta make yourself or you'll just rot.
One thing you'll notice about people from toms river is that many arent aware taht there si another world outside of TR. Big deal you were captain of the football team or Prom queen. Guess waht other people in other towns around the globe where too.
If your old I would say retire here because it is just a huge Senior Citizen Living Facility. But if your old you probably dont have a computer and even if you did you wouldnt be on this site....TR 4 Life, I cant help it.
Toms River is the place where dreams come to be crushed and lives come to be wasted from the sheer intangible concept of boredom. But do come enjoy our beaches.
by HIP-HOP Anonymous May 28, 2006
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