David Blomstrom's definitions

Bill Gates

1. world's richest asshole and convicted monopolist<br>
2. world's richest living example of Silver Spoon Syndrome<br>
3. corporate software tycoon who made billions with the help of his father (a famously sleazy Seattle attorney and partner with Preston Gates & Ellis of Jack Abramoff fame) and a phenomenal talent for stealing other people's ideas and manipulating the government and media<b>
4. Seattle-born geek who's often credited with the birth of the personal computer even though he's done more than anyone else to retard the industry<br>
5. the world's greatest pseudo-philanthropist, perhaps of all time

Having a wife who sits on the Washington Post's board of directors, along with his bridge partner (Warrenn Buffett), makes it easy for Bill Gates to disguise his public relations efforts, bribes and tax write-offs as philanthropy, even duping many liberal activists.

by David Blomstrom May 22, 2006

Microsludge

A nickname for software programs produced by Microsoft, a key member of the Seattle Mafia and global bully.

His computer was clogged with the usual Microsludge - Windoze, M$ Office, Internet Exploder, etc.

by David Blomstrom October 19, 2007

Microsoft

1. official name of one of the world's most powerful and corrupt corporations, increasingly known as Microshaft, Microshit, Mickeysoft or simply M$<br>
2. corporation known for making unbelievably crappy software, then shoving it down consumers' throats, screwing competitors and taxpayers and exploiting public school students in the process<br>
3. corporation founded by Bill Gates and Paul Allen, two of the world's richest assholes and virtual monarchs of the corporate brothel called Seattle<br>
4. mega-corporation that can't handle real competition
5. powerful member of the Seattle Mafia

If it weren't for software bug fixes and virus advice, Microsoft's website traffic might slow to a crawl.

by David Blomstrom May 22, 2006

Microslug

One of many nicknames for Microsoft, this one hinting at the bureaucratic inertia and bloated code it has become famous for; generally synonymous with Microsloth.

Will Microslug release another Windows upgrade in our lifetime, or is Vista the end of the Road Ahead?

by David Blomstrom October 19, 2007

Great Depression II

An increasingly popular term for a global economic crisis generally blamed on corporate corruption based in the U.S., especially under President George W. Bush, though its full impact will occur after Bush's departure from public office. As of January 2009, it isn't certain whether the crisis will equal or even surpass the original Great Depression in severity, though comparing the two events is akin to comparing apples and oranges.

The global economic crisis that many are referring to as Great Depression II has been variously blamed on corporate corruption, globalization, capitalism, George W. Bush and greed and stupidity, all of which are coincidentally associated with Bill Gates, whose public relations team ironically promotes as a philanthropist.

by David Blomstrom January 31, 2009

Vista

noun...
1) Microsoft's latest - and perhaps last - major operating system upgrade (unless you count its legendary "service packs" as upgrades)

2) A not so clever copy of Apple Mac's operating system

3) The latest evidence that Bill Gates is losing his grip on sanity

4) A bizarre suicidal move that may be recalled by future generations as "Hasta la Vista, Microsoft"

verb...
1) To self-destruct

2) To copy another software program

noun...
The Seattle Mafia may celebrate Vista, but most people around the world regard it as a mechanical version of George W. Bush.

verb...
Bill Gates: Shall we Vista another Mac program, or shall we try our hand at innovation this time around?

by David Blomstrom March 4, 2007

Microsoft Whore

A person who supports Microsoft, particularly in the political arena.

George W. Bush may be the most powerful Microsoft whore on the planet.

by David Blomstrom October 19, 2007