D. Gould's definitions

switch hit

Masterbating, with your non-dominant hand. Much like a "friendly stranger", it supposedly gives one the feeling of being tugged by another person.

"If you're right-handed, why don't you jerk off with your right hand?"

"Because if you switch hit, it makes you cum faster."

by D. Gould June 11, 2006

professional bargainer

In retail, a customer who feels they are absolved, for whatever reason, from paying the full retail, or even sale price, of an item. They are ruthlessly aggressive, cutthroat, and Grade-A social bottomfeeders, of the lowest order. Often they will use every lie or excuse in the book, in order to garnish themselves a deal. They will claim a product is damaged, when it is not. They will claim to be family of staff, when they are not. Females will attempt to use sexual charm, while males prefer verbal aggression, to try and break down a salesperson. Easily spotted. Often found standing in the middle of the store, yelling at the top of their lungs, and making an ass of themselves.

"If that 'professional bargainer' makes a purchase from you, make sure you hit him up with the hidden 'PAIN IN MY ASS' tax. He has it coming to him!"

by D. Gould January 13, 2006

faganomics

All things pretaining to the male, homosexual lifestyle. With heavy emphasis, on overly feminine behaviours.

"Owning leather chaps, but no motorcycle, is an obvious sign of faganomics at work."

by D. Gould June 1, 2006

shit magnet

Any person, in which trouble and drama, follows them everywhere they go.

"Stay away from that chick. She's a total shit magnet."

by D. Gould January 3, 2007

concrete shoes

A method of human disposal, developed and perfected by the Italian mob. Involves encasing a person's feet in poured concrete, and dumping them, alive or dead, into a deep body of water.

"Luco Brata sleeps with the fishes. We just fitted him for concrete shoes."

by D. Gould February 9, 2006

call a lumberjack

What you need to do when you get "wood", from looking at a hot chick.

"Uh oh. Someone call a lumberjack. 'Cause I got WOOD!"

by D. Gould February 6, 2006

"Oh Shit" Bar

The passenger grab rail on a sportbike. Or, can also be a passenger holding strap, located at the front of the sportbike's "bitch seat". Refered to as the "Oh Shit" Bar, because that's the last thing your passenger will ever say, if they lose their grip on it.

"Amy ended up in intensive care, when she lost hold of the "Oh Shit" Bar, while Rico was rounding a curb."

by D. Gould October 9, 2006