5 definitions by Confooshus
A trait specifically focused on women, referring to a completely incompetent person, who is constantly incapable in answering her own mathematics questions. This person normally is associated with a stagnant smell of crushed dreams and kicking orphan's shins. Really hard.
by Confooshus October 25, 2017
An incompetent person who is unable to accomplish anything in life, so he/she decided to select the hardest option possible and put in as minimal effort in supporting those around them, ultimately becoming the bane of everyone's existence due to their sheer obliviousness to how much they suck at life.
by Confooshus October 16, 2017
A sexual act, where a male hangs himself by his scrotum wrapped in the American flag, repetitively singing Yankee doodle dandy and masturbating until he passes out.
by Confooshus October 10, 2017
The strongest anti-depressant, capable of curing any form of sadness. Comes in many flavours, and can be combined to reach ultimate tranquillity. Ice Cream also has remarkable healing properties, able to cure the pain of any abrasion or graze, while still providing the user with a healthy supplement.
"Oh my, my parents died and my fish got eaten by my cat who then died of a cardiac arrest and i fell off my bike and snapped both my femurs landing on a newborn baby, causing it to roll down a hill, in front of a petrol tanker that swerved, crashing into an orphanage and burning it to the ground. And now i'm in a wheelchair forever as a paraplegic. I need some ice cream."
by Confooshus October 20, 2017
A national delicacy, this cheese is the only non dairy cheese to be matured on the human body, fermented under the rims of the bellend to achieve a nutty and occasionally fruity taste depending on the time left to age and the ageing process itself. Is commonly used as a light spread on toast, and works excellently as a tangy kick to a salad of stir fry.
Timothy, could you please allow your mother to borrow some of your smegma? I'm making a salad for the neighbors and feel as if it requires a bit of a tang.
by Confooshus September 13, 2018