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Braveheart's thirst for blood's definitions

nuclear submarine

When defecating, the biggest, most awesomely large dump that you haven't had in a good long time. Usually arises from not crapping for more than 48 hours or when coming off of constipation. Called so because the waste is so big, it's like a nuclear submarine trying to leave the bowels, which is a very large submarine. An atomic dump.
Today I went over Memere's house and launched a nuclear submarine.

Try as he might, the nuclear submarine deep in Gorby's colon wouldn't come free, until he had some Taco Bell and it was launched in the public restroom.
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Christ on a stick

Referring to the event of the Crucifixion of Jesus Christ. He was nailed to a cross (standard Christian) or a stake (Jehovah's Witness).
Today's kids don't realize how friendly Jesus is because they've never seen Christ on a stick and they don't know how much he suffered.
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Hat Trick

Eating Breakfast, Lunch, and Dinner at each of the restaurants you choose. This is quite a feat when you don't have a car and have to rely on your parents to drive you places.
"On my birthday I managed to pull off the Hat Trick, I ate at Dunkin Donuts in the morning, Burger King at noon, and had breadsticks at Pizza Hut at dinner time."
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earth sex

When a desperate man who can't get a girl waits until it's raining out and makes a small hole in the muddy ground and inserts his white helmeted soldier of love into it.
"I had no girlfriend back then, so I went outside and had earth sex."
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nappy-headed ho

Suggested lyrics for a death-metal song which should be played on a spark transmitter which spams the entire radio area of the electromagnetic spectrum, and puritanical dictators heads will be strapped to the biggest, loudest speaker at the metal concert until they get the concept of true freedom through their lead-shielded skull.
<guitar strum> "nappy-headed ho! opression rots! nappy-headed ho!" <screaming anti-praise for Satan> "the joy and righteousness of selling Cuban cigars to 10 year olds!"<etc>.
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two-dimensional organism

A type of mythical creature in the science-fiction/fantasy world that exists in only two dimensions. Is incapable of seeing the third dimension. The most notable feature is that it is required to eat and excrete out of the same orfice. That is, if the digestive system had 2 openings, it would cut the organism in two.
A two-dimensional organism's mouth is also its anus.

Even an ameoba is not a two-dimensional organism.
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sexual harassment

The biggest scam perpetrated on America since Scientology.
GodlyMan:"What a nice girly dress you have."
Atheist4Life:"Don't talk to me like that or I'll sue you for sexual harassment!"
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