1 definition by Bethie B
A feeling of being not worthy of life, feeling unhappy but not knowing why, a feeling at the pit of your stomache.
I feel so empty, ugly and agressive, I hate myself, sometimes I want to die, sometimes I just don't want to exist. No one understands me, I feel like no one really cares, that frustrates me, I am so depressed,why can no one understand.
Constantly I have to compensate by spending excessively, buying lovely clothes in the hope that they will make me feel like a beautiful person, not an ugly worthless piece of crap.
Everything annoys me, the mess of my house, my house feels empty so I have to buy things to compensate. What am I compensating for? Love? Happieness? I had love once and lost it too. I wasn't happy when I had it, wasn't happy when I lost it. What will make me feel complete?
It's not not having someone that makes you lonely and it is hard to explain what lonely is. Nothing seems to help, life seems pointless. I can't relax, when I do, I start to think, dark scarey thoughts, horrible thoughts of anger, hate, emptieness.
Depression is hard, however you can survive. You have to talk to someone, doctors can help. Having a sympathetic ear helps, not someone that tells you why you feel the way you feel but someone that just listens. Writing a journal helps too, this gets the thoughts out of your mind, just like talking to someone.
Life is hard but we all have, we just have to survice, keep fighting, it's not worthless.
Constantly I have to compensate by spending excessively, buying lovely clothes in the hope that they will make me feel like a beautiful person, not an ugly worthless piece of crap.
Everything annoys me, the mess of my house, my house feels empty so I have to buy things to compensate. What am I compensating for? Love? Happieness? I had love once and lost it too. I wasn't happy when I had it, wasn't happy when I lost it. What will make me feel complete?
It's not not having someone that makes you lonely and it is hard to explain what lonely is. Nothing seems to help, life seems pointless. I can't relax, when I do, I start to think, dark scarey thoughts, horrible thoughts of anger, hate, emptieness.
Depression is hard, however you can survive. You have to talk to someone, doctors can help. Having a sympathetic ear helps, not someone that tells you why you feel the way you feel but someone that just listens. Writing a journal helps too, this gets the thoughts out of your mind, just like talking to someone.
Life is hard but we all have, we just have to survice, keep fighting, it's not worthless.
by Bethie B June 9, 2008