6 definitions by Baklava42

Top Definition
An awesome band from Serbia which plays Irish music. Their frontman is called Aca Celtic (Aca is pronounced "Azza", like "pizza" with an A instead of PI) and he rocks. Most of their songs are in English, and they make their own songs (like "Far Away") as well as playing old Irish ones (like "Rocky Road to Dublin").
Aca Celtic was once bullied by one of his teachers in high school and then came back with his crew and dumped the bastard in a garbage container.
Orthodox Celts usually make a New Year concert every year in Serbia.
by Baklava42 January 19, 2007
SBB, short for "Serbian Broad Band" company, is an organisation of professional assholes and buttmunches who screw people over about cable internet, making them pay for cable tv besides internet, while that's not mentioned anywhere in the contract. They are great fans of anal sex, only if it's gay of course, and some of them even change their sex and then go hang out with fat greasy masturbating bums to get cock. The anus of an average SBB employee is about the size of Norway, only slightly wider.
It is debated whether the black holes really exist in the universe or are they just anuses of SBB employees from another dimension.
"Hey, check out that guy blowing that other guy's cock in the alley!"
"Yeah, they must be employed in SBB".

"The only thing on Earth that can be seen from the Moon is an SBB employee's anus."
by Baklava42 January 16, 2007
The Serbian version of Santa Claus, Deda Mraz literally means "Old Man Winter" or "The Chilling Grandpa". I prefer "The Chilling Grandpa" version cause it sounds cooler.
It is interesting that the Chillin' Grandpa, unlike Santa Claus, works on the New Year's eve and not on Christmas. Hence, Christmas is somewhat less commercialised in Serbia, and kids get the presents earlier since the orthodox Christmas comes 7th July. That has something to do with churches and some Pope changing calendars, it's all pretty f*cked up if you ask me.
Since Serbian and Croatian languages are basically the same, I might as well describe their Santa a little too. Ok, so they call him Djed Bozicnjak which means something like "Grandpa Christmassy". He's more similar to the western Santa since Croatians are catholic and their Christmas comes 25th of December. That makes their kids get presents earlier than Serbian ones. However, this is compensated to the Serbs. Namely, because of their unaccepting of the western calendar, their will to party, and some holes in the system, the Serbs celebrate TWO NEW YEAR DAYS, one being the usual 31st December one, and the second being 13th of January.
The Bosnyaks (people inhabiting Bosnia, actually a mixture of islamic Serbs and Croatians) are muslim so they don't celebrate Christmas, and henceforth have no Santa. Since Santa of today isn't actually connected to religion (except that the idea for him is derived from Saint Nicholas), it remains unanswered why didn't the muslim people accept Santanism (belief in Santa). Some claim that's because most muslim people live in very hot places (such as Iraq, Iran, Lebanon etc), where there is no need for chimneys and therefore no place where Santa could enter the house.
Conclusions: Deda Mraz, or the Chillin' Grandpa, has the coolest name in the region, Serbs have two New Year days, and most Muslim people don't have chimeys.
Whoever gives me free stuff is good, be it Santa, Deda Mraz, Easter Bunny, or those people who give out condoms to prevent AIDS.
by Baklava42 January 13, 2007
The state of mind that surpasses ordinary seriousness and is used only in the most horrible of situations such as the attack of manbearpig or the summoning of the mighty power of excelsior.
Al Gore's cerealness about manbearpig is so large that he has the need to say "excelsior" very loudly in public places.
Al Gore is a very cereal person.
People are not taking Al Gore cerial, even though his cerialness is super duper excelsiory.
by Baklava42 January 13, 2007
Chvarak is a candy made in Serbia out of pig fat. It is salty yet sweet and incredibly delicious. It tastes a little like Christmas chocolate in the shape of a Santa Claus, except that it's salty, small and looks like beaver crap.
The conclusion is that in Serbia, chvarak (plural: chvarkovi or chvartzi) is not only food, but a way of life.
Many a chvarak has fallen beneath my wrath.
The only thing Serbs commit genocide upon are chvarkovi.
Chvarakovi are similar to Albanian chocolate, except that Albanian chocolate contains dead squirrels and, more often than not, Albanians (they breed so much that they overpopulated their country. Now, they sent 50% of their children to Kosovo and eat the other 50%)
by Baklava42 January 13, 2007
A bastard who is gross and often fat
You are a gross fat bastard and you should be condemned to eternal damnation in the shape of black people further expanding your big fat ass with their cocks.
by Baklava42 January 13, 2007

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