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1 definition by Backyard Justice

 
1.
Standard Definition:
An SUV bitch is a particular group of American females who drive a large luxury or high end foreign SUV.

SUV bitches are hostile, domineering, inconsiderate, rude, and often deadly drivers. They are often seen cutting other drivers off, tailgating motorists, and refusing to let motorists merge onto freeways. These actions often lead to traffic accidents in which an innocent civilian is maimed by an SUV bitch.

Most SUV bitches will only drive luxury or high end crossover SUVs manufactured by Mercedes, BMW, Lexus, Land Rover, Volkswagen, or Infiniti. Studies have show that most SUV bitches have no need drive such a large and expensive SUV; however, scientists are constantly baffled as more SUV bitches appear on America's motorways. It has been theorized that the SUV bitch drives luxury SUVs as a sign of socioeconomic status and social dominance.

Average American motorists need to be cautious around SUV bitches while on the roadway. The SUV bitch often does not focus on the aspect of driving and is primarily concerned with other factors. Factors such as, talking or texting on the cellphone, putting on makeup, or chatting with friends.

Most SUV bitches are white females around the ages of 18 and up. SUV bitches around the age of 18-25 are more likely to cause accidents.

When you see an SUV bitch on the roadway. Follow these safety guidelines provided by the National Transportation and Safety Board.

1. Maintain a distance of at least 4 car lengths away from the SUV bitch.

2. If the SUV bitch trailing behind you closely. Safely pull over and let the SUV bitch drive ahead.

3. When crossing an intersection with no stoplight or sign, remember that SUV bitches always have the right of way.

4. When merging onto a highway be prepared to yield to SUV bitches speeding in the right lane
Randy: "Craig what the hell happened to you!?"

Craig: "I was on my way to work when I was blindsided by an SUV bitch in a white Land Rover"

Randy: "What the fuck?"

Craig: "Yeah, I was merging onto the interstate when some 20 something SUV bitch struck me from behind going ten miles over the speed limit"

Randy: "Dear God!"

Craig: "Turns out she was texting her friend Alexis and she never saw me"

Randy: "You need to take this to court!"

Craig: "I wish but my lawyer said I was at fault!"

Randy: "How?"

Craig: "I should have yielded....."

Doctor: "Craig, I have to amputate your left leg. I'm sorry but it hasn't healed and its infected"
by Backyard Justice May 13, 2008
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