BJmike's definitions

Corn on the cob

When a woman (or man) moves both of her(his) lips back and forth along the length of the shaft of a man's penis, simulating the eating of corn on the cob.

She teased me with some Corn on the Cob before she actually sucked my cock

by bjmike January 16, 2010

motorcycle fuck

A sexual position where the man is standing, the woman is lying on the bed with her legs up in the air, he is inside her and is holding her ankles. The woman's legs are then crossed over, so that they form an "X" between the couple. The man then grasps her right foot with his right hand, and her left foot with his left hand. This has the added benefit of tightening her grip on the man's penis. Her legs will now look like handlebars, and her feet, the handlebar grips. At this point it is best to make motorcycle noises and twist the right grip (her right foot) accordingly. Optionally, the woman can make the motorcycle noises.

We did lots of crazy positions, but the best was the motorcycle fuck.

by bjmike January 18, 2010

Jackson Pollock

When a person vomits and it results in a wild abstract pattern on the ground, wall or floor.

He had some bad clams and vomited a huge Jackson Pollock on the wall.

by bjmike February 10, 2010

Marcel Marceau

The result of cumming on a woman's face, making her resemble the famous mime. Best performed with an epic first load.

Last night I blasted her with an epic first load and turned her into Marcel Marceau!

by bjmike September 18, 2017

Pile Driver

A somewhat challenging sexual position which has the receiver lay on their back. usually on a padded floor, with their lower back and legs raised all the way up so that their ankles are either side of (and beyond) their own head. The exact end position will depend on the flexibility of the receiver. This position totally exposes the groin area to the giving partner who stands astride the receiver's groin to perform. The giver squats over the receiver, facing her, and moves up and down on the receiver to create friction. The giver is also able to use their hands to caress and explore their partner's lower body.

This is a sexual position that requires considerable flexibility on the part of the receiver and it cannot be (fully) achieved by most. It is advantageous for its feeling of being totally exposed and "giving it all". Those less flexible might try getting into the position, but stop at the point where the position starts to become uncomfortable. The giver can also help those less flexible by using their hands to support the receiver's thighs at mid-point. The giver should be careful not to over-extend the penis beyond what is comfortable at this unusual angle (penis pointing downwards).

They were ready to kick their sex life up a notch, so they tried things like the Pile Driver

by bjmike April 26, 2010

oral sex

The erotic spoken portion of sex, when sex partners express sounds, grunts, words, phrases or questions. The volume can range from whispers to screams. Just about anything that is said during sex can be considered oral sex.

These utterances usually are expressions of pleasure or commands to do a certain act.

Oral sex usually contains the word "fuck", but "shit" is also popular.

Oral sex falls into four categories: general fuck expressions, expressions of pleasure, commands and questions.

1. (general fuck expressions)
Fuck me!
Fuck me harder!
Shit yeah!
Fuck it!
Fuck yeah!
It feels so (fucking) good!
Shit! or Shiiiiiiit!
etc.

2. (grunts/expressions of pleasure)
Oh
Ah
Uu
Uh
Mm
Ya
Oh Yeah!
etc.

3. (commands)
Suck that (fucking) dick/cock!
Lick (suck) my (fucking) balls!
Get it all!
Right there!
Fuck my hole!
Harder!
Open that (fucking) pussy!
Give me that (fucking) pussy!
Fuck my dick/cock!
Pull my hair!
Suck my tits!
Pinch my nipples!
Sit on that (fucking) dick/cock!
Jerk that dick (cock)etc.
etc.

4. (questions)
You like that (fucking) dick/cock?
You like that tight (fucking) pussy?
You like that shit, baby?
You like sucking that big (fucking) dick/cock?
You want that (fucking) cum in your mouth? (on your tits/face)?
etc.

1. She gave me fantastic oral sex, but probably not the kind you're thinking of.

2. Her oral sex was so loud, I thought it would wake the neighbors!

by bjmike January 26, 2010

Old TV

A funny sexual position where the man moves the woman's elevated and outstretched legs as though he is trying different orientations for an old-time TV antenna.

The "Old TV" position made them laugh like crazy, but it never did help the TV picture.

by bjmike March 22, 2010