When your significant other is playing an iphone game while still in bed with arms wrapped around you and refuses to let go of you because this means the game will have to be interrupted.
I wet myself this morning because my girlfriend had me in an iphone headlock.
Getting caught up in urban white middle-class activities you don't want to be a part of.
"Yesterday my colleagues all went to a local interpretive dance performance and I couldn't get out of it."
"Oh man, what a whitemare!"
When you are trying to strike up a conversation and the one you are trying to talk to gives you no response.
"Everything I asked him, all I got was just a yes or a no. It was some heavy social weightlifting!"
Also known as a Plato Puss. When you think you recognise a cat but when you run towards it frantically to pet it this "cat" turns out to be some lifeless object. This happens most to cat-happy people who want to see cats everywhere.
You walk down the street and see a cat basking in the sunlight only to find out that it's a black trashbag as you approach it. You have just seen a phantom cat.
Someone you have in your Facebook friends list not because you like them so much but because at one point in your life you met them and they live somewhere else completely and you never know when they might come in handy.
Jim: "Hey I was thinking of going to Europe this summer."
Jack: "Oh I have some satellite friends there you can get in touch with!"
Band-term. After one band member decided to quit the band, all the other members already know that it's over but they decide to put up an add for a replacement anyway "just to see where we can take this anyway". After the new recruit joins this band with the enthousiasm of a young pup and probably got himself new "gear" just for this occasion, a month in or so after some half-assed rehearsals the whole band decides to call it quits.
"I got a new bass, a new amp, quit my job so I could make it to all the rehearsals, wrote five songs, and then they decide to quit!"
"Sounds like you we're boarding a sinking ship!"
A state of affairs a childless women of typically over thirty might find herself in. Her biological clock is telling her to have children so much that she romanticises all the ones she sees around her. This can result in a severe clouding of judgement. Symptoms might include unhealthy interest in other people's offspring and irrational appreciation of even the most spoiled little brats.
The kids were running and screaming, naggin and breaking stuff and yet she looked upon them with a smile and a tear in her eye betraying tender affection due to her throbbing ovaries.