An often vital practice relating to
relationship-maintenance. Relationship counselors broadly refer to this as preserving “healthy vulnerability,” or tletting down your guard, being completely honest,in order to demonstrate loyalty, love,
trust, and willingness to self-sacrifice for a friend who might not immediately appreciate such risk, interpreting it instead as intrusiveness and abuse at first.
Theory: A constant background level of nagging can insure that when you do “lose your shit,” you will be around supportive friends who are willing to change your emotional diaper. The insult-trading practice of “Playing the dozens” use to serve a similar purpose in the Black community until it fell out of fashion due to its historically-repugnant origins in slavery (devaluation/objectification when slaves were bundled by the dozen). It's a social means to avoid the emptiness of “I’m
fine” when checking in with a friend who may be too full of
grit to want to burden others with personal problems. This is also why in
New York City, “F*ck you!” and “F*ck you too!” have respectively come to replace “Hello my friend! Are you truly okay?” and “Why yes I am.
Thank you for caring so sincerely and deeply!”
Busting My
Balls:
Tony and Vincenzo were busting each other's
balls until Vincenzo broke down and admitted he he had to put down his 25-year old retriever,
Zeus, today. We should bring him some Stromboli and get blotto with him later.
