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Waste Numbers are numbers that can be assigned to bodily secretions during times when yelling "I NEED TO TAKE A SHIT!" may not be appropriate. Teachers also use them in preschool or kindergarten classes. The first 5 are ones all people can do. 6s are performed primarily by males, and 7 & 8 are exclusively female functions. Diarrhea is not assigned a number because it is essentially a form of #2. It can be called "#2 EXTREME!"
#1 = Urinate (pee)
#2 = Defecate (poop)
#3 = Flatulence (fart)
#4 = Vomit (barf)
#5 = Spit (hock-a-loogie)
#6 = ejaculate (cum)
#7 = menstruate (period)
#8 = vaginal gas expulsion (queef)
Snot-Nosed-Brat-girl: "I gotta go to the bathroom."
Preschool Teacher: "#1 or #2?"
Snot-Nosed-Brat-girl: "Numba two x-treme! Life cereal gives me the shits. Fo sheezie ma neezie."
by Yobastanker November 22, 2004
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