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MILF (Mother I'd Like to Fuck) that you wouldn't or a Cougar that has seen better days. Basically any MILF or cougar who obviously believes that she is the shit, when in fact that is what she looks like.

Notable for features including, but not limited to:
-seriously wrinkled or damaged skin
-likely obvious cosmetic procedures, some of which may have gone all kinds of wrong (lopsided boob job, too much botox, so on)
-bloated ass that may have the appearance of having sat too long on a gravel driveway
-alternatively, a formerly bloated ass that has gone south, giving the appearance of a fresh dump
-the distinct odor of cheap perfume combined with desperation and self-denial
-wearing clothes 15 years too young and 2-3 sizes too small

Just take a look at the female alumni your average college gameday or your local meat market. Any sad-ass hausfrau on Nip/Tuck will do just as well.
Janice Dickinson used to be the shit, now she's just a washed up sour MILF.

by Knoxville Johnny March 21, 2007
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