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A social gathering in which the people attending the party attempt to get so drunk, they can't even crawl across a porch. It involves mixing the drink in a very large tub with ice. Often a cooler is used. The drink is made with Canadian beer, vodka, whisky, and pink lemonade. Several recipes may be found online.
Brian: Hey man, what are you up to tonight?

Kevin: Dude, we're having a porch crawler. It's $10 a piece - you in?

Brian: Dude, I was so drunk last night, I don't remember what happened.

Kevin: Didn't you say that you were going to a porch crawler or something?
by TheDarkness420 January 21, 2010
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A mixed alcoholic beverage that consists of beer, vodka, gin, and (pink) lemonade. The sweetness of the lemonade combats the bitter taste associated with alcohol. If made properly, the deliciousness will deceive you and you can get absolutely fucked without realizing that you're ingesting a deadly concoction. Similar to spiked fruit punches, porchcrawler is usually made in large batches.
Shawn: Who's down to pitch in $10? I'm thinking of making some porchcrawler for pregame before tonight's kegger

Billy: I had a cup and a half of porchcrawler from last night and I didn't even end up getting to the party because I was so wasted.

Natalie: Mmmm.. WTF is this shit? It tastes SOO good!
** chugs 2 cups; 10 min later**
Chloe: Look at that bitty crawling on the porch. She looks so helpless!
Megan: It's funny because she probably had some of Shawn's porchcrawler, that shit gets you fucked!
by slothluv October 03, 2013
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