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The postition given to a man that exceeds the expectations of crack addicts and sex offenders. He patrols the hall of a dorm to make sure there's no fires or fire hazards. This man has a built in fire hose. Also has an office in the community bathroom.
Zach: Fire!!!

Matt: Go get Colonel Fire!

Zach: Can't, he's in the office.

Matt: FML!
by Mayo Sanchez October 07, 2009
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