6 definition by jmjoyce451

Top Definition
A state of perceived intellectual superiority one gains by reading The Huffington Post.
Ali is so woke. At brunch she explained how wearing anything other than Chuck Taylor's or Tom's is really a microaggression. Hey did you get your Amy Schumer tickets yet?
by jmjoyce451 August 18, 2016

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Survival Beers (noun, always plural) are alcoholic beverages, usually derived from wheat and barley, which are consumed strictly for survival purposes after a heavy day/night/week of drinking. When one is faced with a seemingly insurmountable hangover, Survival Beers are the one proven method of getting you through your day. In most cases, Survival Beers are consumed shortly after waking up, usually at hours when the consumption of alcoholic beverages is commonly frowned upon by the general public. Survival Beers are known to have many confirmed benefits including, but not limited to: easing anxiety, increasing motor skills, and helping you regain the ability to verbally communicate. Survival Beers have not been proven to undo one's actions from the previous night, or provide any tangible short term or long term benefit to one's life. Common side effects of Survival Beers include nausea, guilt, wasted days, irreparable damage to personal relationships, and termination of employment.
After blacking out at the Red Sox game on Thursday night, John knew the only way he would be able to function at work on Friday was if he consumed Survival Beers at lunch.
by jmjoyce451 December 19, 2014

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A rudimentary yet surprisingly effective mating call, utilized most frequently by males in the Boston metropolitan area.
Hey, roll my window down and hold my beer. NICE BUM WHERE YA FROM!!!!
by jmjoyce451 August 18, 2016

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Making people aware of your whereabouts via snapchat, although nobody really cares
*starts filming*
Person 1: "checkin in"
Person 2: "checkin in"
Person 3: "checkin in"
by jmjoyce451 August 18, 2016

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Electrolyte rich beverages that are most commonly enjoyed after a night of excessive alcohol consumption
We went to Centerfolds last night? I have an ATM receipt for a $400 withdrawal. Give me some of that sweet nectar of the gods.
by jmjoyce451 August 12, 2016

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A typically inadvertent way of calling someone ugly, usually in attempt to make the asshole who said it feel like less of an asshole
Did you see me tell Emma she was beautiful inside and out on Instagram You saw it right? I feel good about myself now.
by jmjoyce451 August 18, 2016

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