h.s. willsy's definitions

Trick of the Thai

Mistaking a male Thai prostitute for a female one can be called a 'trick of the thai' due to how ladylike many of them look. It's usually an excuse made by men who were out shopping for some ladyboy action, got caught getting it and then didn't want to admit to it after. Because why would they not just check up front if they didn't want it? It's not like we don't know that they're out there. Lurking.

"Whoa, hey Stan, this girls got balls!"

"Wha...err...oh, no way. Total trick of the thai man, I well thought it was a girl. Honest."

"Hmm."

"Yeah...can I have five minutes to finish off?"

by H.S. Willsy August 26, 2011

Whoa

The collective noun of hippies, as in- a whoa of hippies

"Which whoa were you in, the one with the drum circle or the one that Timothy Leary was hanging around?"

"Err...it was the one with the dragon that kept vomiting itself inside out... I think."

"Okay so the second one then. Now lets just go over there and get your goddamn shoes back so we can leave."

by H.S. Willsy August 18, 2011

Action Satchel

An alternative name for man-bags that was invented to make insecure men feel less effeminate about owning what is essentially a handbag.

Clutching his action satchel, Timmy barged through the closed wooden doors and out into the storm.

"I'll show those lousy lumberjacks who's a real man," he shrieked, stomping his foot against the floor like some sort of wet sissy grasshopper. "I'LL SHOW EM, I'LL SHOW EM, I'LL SHOW EM!!!"

by H.S. Willsy August 25, 2011

Robert Downey Juniored

When someone is wasted to the point that they are indiscriminately unloading their weapon on a busy street, they are Robert Downy Juniored

"The fuck's that noise?"

"It's this guy outside, he's Robert Downey Juniored!"

"It's Robert Downey Jr?" Ted asked, having misheard over the drunken gunfire. "I gotta go get his autograph!"

"No!" Billy screamed over the hail of gunfire that met his friend. "No!"

by H.S. Willsy August 26, 2011

One Eyed Bandit

A type of live action gambling that can be undertaken in Thailand. First of all the gambler must select three Thai hookers and take them back to his room. The gambler then asks them to reveal their genitals, one by one. Like with a one armed bandit (English word for slot machine), the way to win is to get three cherries in a row. Any less than three cherries and you're BUST

"I wish they had some one armed bandit machines out here."

"We could just play one eyed bandit?"

"Hmm, yeah. Or Thai roulette maybe?"

"Either or man, I just need to unload quickly before my balls get any heavier. I feel like I'm lugging around a couple of coconuts in a 50g peanut bag."

by H.S. Willsy August 26, 2011

Depraviar

When semen is used for any purpose other than impregnating your lovely wife, it is more correctly known as depraviar

A combination of depravity and caviar (man seed)

"Leave it in honey, maybe we can make a baby?"

"Fuck that!"

"Jeez! You got it in my eye! Fuck, now it's just depraviar."

by H.S. Willsy August 25, 2011

The Pregnancy Craving Shield

When pregnant women eat junk food with no positive nutritional qualities and claim that it's a craving, they're using the pregnancy craving shield.

"Could you go out and get me another two bags of chips? And a deep fried pizza slice?"

"Really?"

"I'M CRAVING IT!"

"Jesus, put the pregnancy craving shield down already. I'll get it for you. Just stop looking at me like I'm a man-sized chicken leg."

by H.S. Willsy August 26, 2011