aka Bullshit University, located in Maastricht, The Netherlands, but infested by
Germans. The only university where, even if you ace an exam, you can still fail the entire course because you skipped ONE lesson. At UM, life just plain sucks and
weed,
Ritalin and
vodka are the only way to get through it all. UM attracts tons of international students (all thanks to some
marketing bullshit), especially Germans who for some reason think it's some sort of European
Harvard. Everyone in Maastricht is either a
psychopath, a
junkie or
depressed. To add insult to injury, moving to Maastricht also causes you to get
Maastricht Syndrome.
Not to mention that everyone who works at UM believes they're in the best uni on earth, even though UM actually ranks pretty bad among the 'good' uni's in
Europe
"I skipped 2 out of 20 tutorials and now I have to do a 60 page essay course assignment within 3 days, otherwise I'll have to graduate a year later.
Maastricht University is such a fucking
nightmare."
"Goddammit, how come the
Germans at
Maastricht University always get such high grades while everyone else is struggling so much?? Oh wait I know! They're all psychopaths!"
"If you say
Maastricht University backwards three times while looking into a mirror, you'll be exempted from all resits."
