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Definitions by Throat punchingbag

Eggplant Ponderosa 

When you can't please your wife so you have to call your only black friend to come over and please her with his very endowed member
John: Hey man...
Dan: What's up dude?
John: How are you and Jan?
Dan: Well things weren't going so well in the bedroom dept. so I made a call to get an Eggplant Ponderosa. She's never been happier!