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Pungo Driver's definitions

Spandex Inquisition

(n.) Street bicycle enthusiasts. They are usually very argumentative about their road rights despite not having road tax, registration or license. Other common traits include street sign blindness and apparent enjoyment of a narrow bicycle seat deeply inserted in their rectum. It's commonly believed that their over-tightened helmet and Dayglo body armor lend to their superhuman courage. Exhibiting herd mentality, they usually ride six abreast in packs of 36 or more. They are highly offended by bicycle paths, sidewalks and easements.
Driver: Holy $%#*, I almost squashed that guy like a bug when he shot through the stop sign!!

Passenger: Nobody expects the Spandex Inquisition! Buhm-buhm-buh!
by Pungo Driver September 3, 2011
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