27 definitions by Professor Kukui

1
A highschooler who thinks vaping is cool.
Kenzie: “Why are you regergitating a cloud?”

Joey: “Bro, it’s my Juul, I’m vaping.”

Kenzie: “That’s bad for you-“

Joey: “EAT MY ASS, BRO!”

Kenzie: “You’re a Nico-teen.”
by Professor Kukui February 15, 2019
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2
The act of drawing a male reproductive organ on the chalk board before class, and then covering it up with a magnet befor the teacher walks in.
The teacher will eventually take notice of the magnet and remove it, resulting in them having a mental breakdown when they see the penile organ.
Works best with strict and/or substitute teachers.
Pranav: "Mark, why the hell are you drawing a dick on the board?"

Mark: "Just trust me."

(Places Magnet and sits down)

Teacher: "Okay class, Today we are gonna learn about the production of rubber in Africa during the late 1890's."

Pranav: "Fuck me, this is gonna be a boring class."

Teacher: "Hey, what's this doing here?"

(Removes Magent)

Teacher: "WHO THE ACTUAL FUCK DREW THIS GOD DAMN PENIS ON MY FUCKING CHALK BOARD!?"

Mark: "You just got the Chalk Cock, Bitch."

Pranav: "Nevermind, This is the best class ever."
by Professor Kukui April 15, 2018
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3
When a kid masturbates under the cafeteria table and busts a nut into his lunch tray.
Next, he places a second lunch tray on top and firmly presses down on it, letting any excess air escape.
Once the load dries between the two trays, good luck trying to separate them.
(In the lunch line)

Nick: "Damn, these two trays won't come apart, I guess I have to take both."

Kyle: "Oh I know what you mean, I hate cafeteria cumshots."

Nick: "What the hell are you talking about?"

Kyle: "It's jizz, dude."
by Professor Kukui February 01, 2018
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4
The Carbonated clothes dryer is a highly sophisticated technique used by men for extreme sexual pleasure.
A man must soak his flaccid reproductive organ in a glass of Pepsi for roughly 33 hours straight, and remove it once it he feels it has absorbed a decent amount of the beverage.
When the man gets aroused later on, he proceeds to insert his sugary, stained penis inside of his sexual partner's belly butten. Once he ejaculates, the semen will have a refreshing fizz.
"Soon I will no longer be physically capable of performing the carbonated clothes dryer."
-Bruce Jenner
by Professor Kukui December 26, 2017
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5
When a guy eats a shit ton of beans, but holds in all the farts for the next two days. When he feels the time is right, he forces out all of the gas, resulting in an extremely loud and powerful fart.
Kevin: "Yo Nick, come here for a sec."

Nick: "Sure man."

(Walks over)

Kevin: "SSSSPLUUUURRRRRT"

Nick: "Dude, what the fuck!?"

Kevin: "Lol, Beanblast."
by Professor Kukui September 03, 2017
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6
When a smaller, less popular girl that you have never payed much attention to bends over for whatever reason and you notice that she actually has a really sweet ass.
Pranav: "Yo, what's that girl's name again?"

Kyle: "Pfft, don't know, don't care."

Pranav: "Yeah I know, right-HOLY SHIT, BENDY SURPRISE!"

Kyle: "I am suddenly interested."
by Professor Kukui October 10, 2017
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7
When a man uses a rolling pin to flatten out his dick. Once it's paper-thin, he proceeds to fold it into an origami swan.
It's very majestic.
Kevin: Hey, man I'm so sorry for running you over with my car! Are you hurt badly?"

Liam: "Not really. You squished by dick, but that's about it.

Kevin: "Fuck man, that looks painful!"

Liam: "Whatever, this gives me an opportunity to practice the sacred art of the Japanese Flatbread."
by Professor Kukui December 07, 2017
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