That one really good friend you pretend to hate.
Me: Hahahaha no I'd never give you a high five. Oh wait, I would if it was in your face with a brick that had spikes dipped in poison.
WFF: Well excusez-moi, I didn't kick you, I was just toe-tapping a dust particle and you got in the way!
Me: You little son of a biscuit
WFF: Ha, eat my astronaut