Grab me a few pages of the New York Times, please. We're out of bowel towels again.
The highest form of intelligent life in the history of the planet earth.
Michael: "Damn, that guy's smart! Did he stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night?"
Patrick: He's even smarter than THAT...he's a MET FAN!!!
Fat-reducing cosmetic surgery, performed exclusively for the purpose of being able to dance at one's high school reunion without looking like a walrus having a convulsion.
Jim had better get a disco-tuck before the reunion dance. He could kill somebody with that gyrating gut!
After inhaling two pitchers of beer, Ryan made a bee-line for the pisseria.
A woman who is so undesirable that she can kill an already erect cock within seconds of appearing.
Shirley is such an erecticide...my masssive wood went limp as soon as she walked through the door.
Digitally enhanced female breasts.
Alice: "Stop drooling over that photograph. Those are computer hooters".
Engaging in sexual activity.
Variation: "Parking the Winnebago in the back lot". Definition: Engaging in anal sex.
Vito: "Where the hell were YOU all night?"
Guido: "I was at Marie's house, parking the Winnebago."