1 definition by Jack Bauer 1992

Ryley

During the Salem witch trials in the late 1700's the name Ryley was used to describe only the ugliest witches, with long saggy breasts. The only thing that sagged lower than their breasts was their intensely hairy vaginas. The word however, died with the last of the witches that had burned at the stake. It has only resurfaced recently, in the last demi-century, with the rise of the pop-culture revolution. Ryley has always been seen as a girls name, but in some cases boys have fallen victim to the name. Don't be mistaken however, the name stays true to the origin, so therefore everyone with the name Ryley is a big fat witch with a saggy ass vagina. Ryley's are typically known for being messy eaters (almost eating as if they have a massive cock in their mouth, letting semen flow all over their lips) . They are also known for inviting themselves over and eating all of your food and most notedly, stealing all of your beer. They are known to suck obscure amounts of cock, and are most successful at it while being double penetrated with two uncircumscised penises. A Ryley can never be trusted as he/she will most certainly try and stick their saggy vagina in your asshole and try to rape you with it. Despite the fact that they cannot achieve an erection, their saggy clitoris will manage to snake its way into the caverns of your asshole and steal your virginity away in the night.

Joe: Hey man, stop stealing my fucking beer, you piece of shit mooch . I'll rape your mother if you do.

Walter: Fuck you man, I'll do whatever I feel is neccessary. You can suck on my huge scrotum.

Joe: You're such a fucking Ryley man. Get your goddam clitoris out of your ass and give me my Guinness back you motherfucker.

by Jack Bauer 1992 August 14, 2010