A Scottish tea party is the act of placing the cold foot of one's wife betwixt the inner upper thigh of the husband and his sensitive and wholesome members to further the warming of the wife's foot. No other such foot shall ever be allowed for a given husband, once the Scottish Tea Party has been embarked upon, barring infidelity, will forever own completely both feet of said lady or whench, whatever she be. The lady will then be privileged to enjoy the company of a loving arrogant jackass who almost got in a fight at the Corvallis KOA over questions of honor with some rednecks.
by Dr. G. March 26, 2019