The involuntary action of manually manipulating one's genitals during REM sleep. This phenomenon is responsible for some unverifiable portion -- scientific estimates point to 5-10% -- of nocturnal emissions. It is rarely discussed in polite conversation, but is assuredly real. When caught in the act by an incidental third party observer, the awoken offender is often characterized by denial and defensiveness. The following sample text is a rare exception.

Brett: <to roommate sleeping in common living area> Mike -- What are you doing?

Mike: <wakes suddenly and looks down at occupied hands> Dude ... I'm trying to sleepsturbate here.

Brett: What? Can you do that in your room?

Mike: I'll spell it out for you later, asshole.

sleepsturbate by von dildus August 6, 2010

Get merch

sleepless

with out sleep you close your eyes only for them to open again u blink and its already 6 am and you hear the stupid bird chirping outside and you just want to hit them with a rock

boy: I slept great

girl: I was sleepless go fuck yourself brad

sleepless by bella_5792 July 6, 2015

Get merch

sleepies and poopies

The name for a person that gets so drunk that they fall asleep on the floor and wake up to find they have vomitted and shit their pants.

"Omg! That girl was so drunk last night she deffinetly pulled a sleepies and poopies...and that guy guy still had sex with her..but not in the butt, obviously!"

sleepies and poopies by kimmmmmmmmmmmay June 3, 2009

Get merch