Scrumpet, or Scrumpets;

A slang term for semen, such as spooge, cum, jizz, baby batter, etc. Also used to bait unicorns with, as unicorns are known to be highly aroused by scrumpets.
Sue, would you like some scrumpets? There is a fresh batch here in my skin bag.

Unicorns and whorses alike can't resist the taste of fresh scrumpets.

I hooked up with Stacey last night, and dropped a fat scrumpet on her chin.
by Lord Pignuts April 21, 2009

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a biscuit-like food often consumed by the brits with tea. scrumpets are sometimes mistakenly called crumpets.
"I like my scrumpets at the football match," exclaimed Murad.
by juyshin October 03, 2006

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A rolled, often brownish piece of toilet paper that remains after you wipe.
"Dude, Heather was lickin' my balls and she totally ingested a scrumpet."
"I've been tryin to rid of my scrumpets, so I've been using baby wipes."
by mags1923 February 16, 2007

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A kid who thinks he is tough while he really is not
This kid's a gutter scrumpet. He acts all hard but he was born from a family of puds.
by T. February 02, 2005

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a stupid person or blond person generaly a girl, can also mean lesbian (context dependant)in some cases it could mean anything its what u want it to mean
"that girl is such a scrumpet"

"she is such a scrumpet the other day she said 2x2=6"

"ahh im such a scrumpet! lol"
by lockie_oz September 14, 2006

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A brittish delecacy which has a small amount of rat feces in its ingredients.
shall we have tea and scrumpets with our evening meal?
by soapy nipples January 15, 2005

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