pee knees

A urine-based wetness of the knees and shins caused by pissing into a toilet with too much force and/or at the wrong angle of delivery. Pee knees is a very real danger to anyone who pees while standing, particularly at urinals (which are gross and infrequently flushed). Pee knees is characterized by a smelly wetness of the knees and shins, caused by reflective contact with composite urine that those so afflicted can only hope is mostly of their own making. Common methods for reducing the threat of pee knees include pissing whilst sitting (like a bitch), standing farther away from the toilet itself (best to use both hands here), or simply missing the urinal entirely until you get a handle on your flow (I always sweep in from the left like a boss).

man 1: "excuse me sir, why are you pissing on my boot?"

man 2: "pardon me, graciously, but I do not wish to be stricken with pee knees."

by CainFang June 4, 2012

one knee pee

n. stance taken to effectively relieve yourself, usually during an intoxicated state, in extremely crowded areas, i.e. concerts, tailgates, wet t-shirt contests, and/or food and beer festivals (when walking to the restroom is just not an option)

pee, urinate

You are at a crowded concert and the headlining act has just taken the stage. Suddenly, the urge to pee hits you! Everyone knows the lines are long in the bathroom and it will take forever. The only other option is the one knee pee. You assume the one knee stance, pull up your pants/shorts leg past the knee that is touching the ground, pull out tool and let it fly.
Warning: the one knee pee works best under cover of darkness and only in extremely crowded areas. The author of this message is not responsible for anyone who attempts to pee uphill or into the wind.

by Shands_uno August 7, 2007