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The New Mexico Mojito 

While doing a girl from behind, begin to yell incomprehensibly in Spanish, when she turns around to ask you what the hell youre doing, immediately ejaculate into a toilet plunger and stick it on her face without giving her any time to react.
“Hey John, what did you and Stacy do last night?”
“I served up the New Mexico Mojito if you know what I mean!”
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New Mexico shit fire 

A shot of tequila mixed with Bhut Jolokia hot sauce. Bhut jolokia is, of course, one of the spiciest chile peppers in the world, which makes this like a prairie fire shot on steroids. Definitely not for the weak stomach.
"Hey bartender, I need 6 New Mexico shit fires."

Eastern New Mexico University 

One of the most profoundly depressing colleges in the United States. It is 400 miles west of Dallas, and 200 miles east of Albuquerque. Yes, those are the two closest notable cities. To get in, a 14 on the ACT is required, yet many students receive waivers with some scoring as low as an 8. Just for context, putting down "C" as every answer on the ACT will yield an 11. If one were to randomly spill ink on the ACT, they would still outscore the average ENMU student.
This college is for people who wouldn't be going to college 20 years ago.
Hey, you also go to Eastern New Mexico University? I'm glad we can both agree that there is no better smell than manure and rural poverty in the morning!

My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead- murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. 

My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead- murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a meth empire for over a year now, and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, he asked that I use my chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamine, which he would then sell using connections that he made through his career with the DEA. I was... astounded. I... I always thought Hank was a very moral man, and I was particularly vulnerable at the time - something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me in on a ride-along and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin, so I agreed. Hank had a partner, a businessman named Gustavo Fring. Hank sold me into servitude to this man.
My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead- murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a meth empire for over a year now, and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, he asked that I use my chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamine, which he would then sell using connections that he made through his career with the DEA. I was... astounded. I... I always thought Hank was a very moral man, and I was particularly vulnerable at the time - something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me in on a ride-along and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin, so I agreed. Hank had a partner, a businessman named Gustavo Fring. Hank sold me into servitude to this man.

University of New Mexico 

Referred to by students as the "University Near Mom". Most of the population consists of kids who graduated from Albuquerque High Schools and get free college for staying in New Mexico. Free college is kind of a win. UNM's basketball stadium, The Pit, is one of the rowdiest ever! And.. there is the Lobos biggest fan, a middle aged bald man who is tatted up and was recently arrested for trying to buy sex from an undercover cop. Gotta love the colorful crowd of Lobo fans. We hard. Going to UNM means that you have top notch food choices a.k.a. all the chile you could possibly want. However, all the out of state kids never fully appreciate it and whine about it because they're little bitches with irritable bowel syndrome. Lots of athletes like to come to New Mexico and moan that there is nothing to do...But they need to take a hike!!!! through the beautiful Sandia mountains with the beautiful girls of Albuquerque who are gracious ambassadors of their city. A lot of the kids who get free college, however, lose their lottery scholarships drop out and become wasteoids who still party with high schoolers. Just by going to UNM, you get mad street cred. However, cops here are super wack and partying is all the time, but very on the DL.
So, don't rip your pants when you have to jump over a fence dragging your drunk ass friend behind you. Get on that Rapid Ride the day after...go to college...and then go buy yourself a breakfast burrito.
I'm going to the University of New Mexico because I don't have to pay anything, I like bomb ass food, enjoy people of hispanic origin, like getting cursed out at sporting events, and enjoy spending time with like 20,000 other students who I probably went to high school with. EVERYONE's a LOBO. woof woof WOOOF.

New Mexico Tech 

A school in Socorro known for lack of girls, high nerd rate, frequency of masturbation, and for its total awesomeness.
I'm going to Tech!

Tech suscks.
You're not smart enough to go to Tech! You can't even spell "sucks."

Tech is awesome.
New Mexico Tech by NM Rox March 12, 2005

New Mexico Tech 

some times abbreviated as NMT
the place with the highest nerd to normal rate on the planet, including NASA.
Hi, I'm from Tech

Yes, I've noticed the lack of social skills, body odor, and Star Trek collectors edition Phaser