As referenced by famous chef Michael Glennon : A creepy mustache often seen on a man or woman who molests people or things.
That creepy guy in the panel van has a molestache
by Chiquita bonana October 29, 2010

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A mustache so disturbingly creepy, it literally molests your eyeballs. It also has been known to put women and men into a trance, whereupon the victim awakens, disrobed with the sneaking suspicion he or she has been raped.
Janine: Holy shit that was close!
Ugly Jane: What was?
Janine: The molestache on that trucker over there almost caught me in its trailer-tractor beam. Now come on, let's scram before we black out and wake up raped!
Ugly Jane: You go on ahead, I'm gonna get my fuck on.
by The Molestache Man May 18, 2011

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a mustache that resembles that which a child molester, such as David Westerfield, might have.
Did you see that guy's molestache Yeah he looks like such a creeper.
by LexiB February 10, 2009

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type of mustache: not quite a pornstache but just as creepy.
looks like: John Mayer trying to grow a Tom Selleck mustache. John Mayer has a molestache.
by skweakrz February 21, 2011

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Creepy facial hair, whether wispy thin or curled into odd shapes, patently unattractive to adult women; Clear perv alert.
Woman #1: Did you hear your neighbor is on the Megan's Law website?!

Woman #2: I knew it! He had a molestache!
by Tempest Fugit March 09, 2012

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a Mustache Child Molesters Always Seem To have
"That Creepy Weird Guy Had A Molestache!"
by trillrichmain May 29, 2013

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A mustache that makes you look like you molest children.
Check out that guys molestache! Keep him within 100 feet of that elementary school.
by lolamite February 03, 2010

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