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masturbation probation 

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When one goes an extended period of time without jerking off. Most will give in to willpower and natural urges, but the courageous and strong can sometimes go for days or weeks without choking the chicken. See The Contest (Seinfeld).
"Yo dude, check out this porn video I found!"
"Nah man, not tonight. I've decided to go on masturbation probation."
masturbation probation by Gayaka June 20, 2009
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Masturbation Proclamation 

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a in progress soon to be bill, giving the freedom to masturbate wherever you choose without consiquence
masturbation proclamation, masturbate in class
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Masturbation Proclamation 

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Law of the land giving any person the ability to claim any object on which they masturbates onto as long as that is not already claimed.
"I now own this due to the essential rights given to me by the Masturbation Proclamation"
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Masturbation Proclamation 

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When one masturbates while reading the Emancipation Proclamation, preferably while dressed as Abraham Lincoln.
Kyle "Dude you should come over tonight"
Brandon "Sorry bro can't, I'm going to do a Masturbation Proclamation"
Masturbation Proclamation by BROmeo69 December 29, 2011
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masturbation procrastination 

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When you throw all your responsibilities out the window and just masturbate.
Damon didn't finish his project until the last minute because he was too busy with masturbation procrastination.
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Masturbation-Probation 

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A Chance To Redeem Yourself During No-Nut-November.
BIGGIEYYY: No! I Just Failed No-Nut-November!

Madajio: Chill Dude, Your Just On Masturbation-Probation Now.
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masturbation professor

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The very essence of UBC Computer Science professors. Unfortunately this disorder passes onto its top students as well.
You need to pay each of the masturbation professors a total whopping sum of 1 million dollars per course per term as they masturbate on both the male and female instagram profiles of their students and talk incoherently in lectures just to pass time and disorient their prey.
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